Nothing Clever to Say...

No news is good news... not so much

2009-12-04T20:46:00.000-08:00

I am horribly busy with work. It is crazy. Everything is a priority, which means I have to make sure that everything is done right now... It is frustrating.

What is more frustrating is the cancer. It is back. Ric had his first yearly PET scan in September. His 6 month scan was clear, we had no reason to expect that this was going to be different. We were optimistic. The scan came back and there was a "small spot" in the lower left lobe of his lung. He was scheduled for a needle biopsy in early October. I took the day off even though my boss had said because of the grants, she didn't want me taking any time off through March. She has allowed me to take as much time as I have needed this last few weeks.

We went in for the biopsy and the machine was broken. They couldn't reschedule for another week. Talk about frustrating! Ric was convinced he would be healed by the grace of God. I wanted to have that faith. I thought I had that kind of faith. That was until the results of the scan came back. The following week he had the biopsy. We were told we would have the results in 3-4 days. A week later we still had not heard from the doctor. Ric called. I called. The doctor never called. At that point we assumed "no news is good news". "Bad news travels fast". Isn't that they way it normally is with cancer? The nurse couldn't give us the information, "the doctor had the file and he would get back to us that afternoon". We waited another 2 days and heard nothing. No news is good news.

I finally got so fed up, I told the nurse that I was going to come in to the office and take the paperwork to our doctor to have the results read. She told me she could fax the information to our doctor. She had the information in front of her all along. I had even told her what we were thinking... no news is good news. Ric received a phone call from Dr. B, the oncologist saying come in tomorrow. Ric received a call from our primary care doctor who the information was faxed to... come in this afternoon.

We went in, he told us he had called Dr. B, he was surprised we had an appointment so soon. He told us the biopsy showed cancer. The same kind that was in his neck. It was in two lymph nodes as well. To say we felt like we had been kicked in the stomach was an understatement.

The next day we went to see Dr. B. He took the file to the tumor board and they said it looked like a new primary. That was Friday. Ric started chemo on Monday. He may have to have radiation as well, but that will be determined after the next PET scan. He has already had two of the three treatments they recommended. Each is three weeks apart. He is thankfully able to work.

Unfortunately, Ric has not gotten any weight back. He weighs 127 pounds at his last appointment. Up .5 pounds from the previous appointment three weeks prior. He still has no taste buds. His remaining salivary glands do not produce enough for him to swallow easily.

We have been dealing with the cancer since February 2008. Two years. We've been married three years. Chemo wrecks havoc on a person's body. It gives them "chemo brain". The short term memory comes and goes. The hair falls out. He had hiccups... again... for a full week, 24 hours a day, no more than a second or two apart. Yeah, it sucked. The intimacy disappears. They tell us that things will get better. When?

You hear about what it does to the person going through the treatments, but do they tell you what the caregiver goes through? I feel like we are just going through the motions. That we are just together for him to have insurance. I hate feeling like this. I love my husband. I do. But I am feeling lonely. I am feeling used. I am feeling lost. I feel hate. Then I feel guilty. I have been supportive. I have put aside my feelings, my emotions, my needs because of this cancer. This thing that has destroyed our lives.

I asked Dr. B what he thought about our chances. Because this may be a new primary, even though it is the same type as was in his neck. It is in his lung, it is in two lymph nodes. He said the chances were small that this would disappear. We will probably be fighting this for a long time... God, I hope it is a long time.

How can I continue this for much longer? At the next PET scan, will there still be cancer? How about the one a year from now? I am always going to be leary of the next scan. I am not going to be able to be absolutely sure that the cancer is gone. I thought our journey on the road of cancer was going to be a success story. Even with the side effects, even with the lack of taste buds, the low protein. These last two years have sucked.

I am always going to be waiting for the next shoe to drop. I am going to be waiting for the news that we have nothing left to fight with. I am so afraid that I am going to watch my husband die like my uncle, like my friend, Marti. I am afraid that I am not going to be able to be strong.

I wonder how we are going to pay the bills. Ric is still getting social security. He is able to work sometimes. We are maxed on the cards, we have no savings. We live paycheck to paycheck. My paycheck. We are behind on bills. Chick spends more and more time with my parents. Not that she doesn't want to be here. She just doesn't like the stress of the house. She likes the fact that there is junk food, not just staples in the house. I have scrimped and saved and she is going to get the camera she wants for Christmas.

Where is my faith? Where is the belief I once had that God would be here for me?

I want to believe that we will get through this and be together for a very long time. My heart hurts. I am tired of crying. I am tired.

2009-07-30T09:03:00.001-07:00

So, I have finished the grants (for the moment), I have been on a wonderful vacation with Chick to visit my brother and his family in Hawaii. Now I am back home and the world keeps going and I really want to get off.

Chick had band camp this week. Notice the past tense? With the heat index as high as it is in the southwest, even at higher elevations and locations that are normally pretty mild in the summer, the temperatures are soaring. The band camp is brutal. Lots and lots of marching (not a problem on a whole). Chick called me totally hysterical one night. Maybe that isn't the correct word, but very upset, crying, she was sick. They had spent 10+ hours outside in 90+ degree heat. Some of it working on their routine on a parking lot. They were told they it was mandatory for them to go to a social function and were not allowed to go back to the rooms to sleep until after 11:00. They had to be up by 6:00. These are teenagers who required 9 hours of sleep a night. She was exhausted, heat sick. I spent Tuesday trying to calm her down enough to get her to take a cool shower and hydrate herself. Two of the kids went home sick. She wanted to come home, I wanted her to stick it out. She spent the evening vomiting. The "nurse" on call went to check her and her friend (who was also sick). She told them she would bring them some crackers and gatorade and never came back to the room. She checked on them Wednesday morning (another night filled with sickness) and said it was their decision to call their parents. I had already been in contact with Chick and was heading up to pick her up. I got a call about an hour from the camp and was asked if I could bring her friend home as well. It is a 4 hour drive away from home. Two sick girls in the car, both slept most of the way. We stopped and got them something to drink and eat since they were both afraid to eat anything for almost 2 days. Better to have something in their stomachs. They ate and slept. Chick is feeling much better this morning. She now has to do a camp here in town. 100+ heat, but they do use air conditioned buildings for some of the events. And I am just down the road and will be checking in frequently.

I did some research. Did you know the military has a chart that shows how long you are allowed to make soldiers work outside? For moderate activity in the temperatures at the band camp, they should have been active for 20 minutes and rest, in the shade for 40 minutes. They were going for 2 hours with a 10 minute break at the end. I was told they are allowed to stop when they need to, etc. Chick did. But she was still overheated and got sick. The "nurse" told me they had a number of kids under the medical tent who were sick. When I called to talk to her the day before I went up, she couldn't even remember which one Chick was. When Chick went back to the room with the other sick kids, they were left alone, while all the other chaperones went out to the field. No one came to check on them. The girls had their cell phones and the "nurse" was just a phone call away, but it took them 10-15 minutes to get back to the rooms. Where was the adult with the sick kids? Granted they are teenagers (13-17), and are for the most part self-reliant, but they were sick, vomiting, dehydrated. For some of these kids (mine included) this was the first time they were that far away from their parents without an adult to "take care" of them.

I called the school, no answer. I called the superintendent, spoke to the admin person, and got the band director is wonderful, there have never been any problems before, blah blah. I am sure she is great. Chick said she never saw her. The BD was working with the band, not the colorguard. The "nurse" and other "chaperones" were too busy watching the marching, rather than taking care of the kids. The school finally called back and wanted to know if I had been in touch with Chick. Yup, I had been home from picking her up for an hour already. It was suggested I write a note to BD and principal to let them know my concerns. You bet they will be getting a letter. I know that this is not going to be an issue during the school year because of the nature of the schedule. That isn't the issue, the issue was the lack of supervision, the lack of concern for sick kids, I never got a phone call from an adult! They were more interested in getting the room keys back from the girls rather than asking how they were. No one had seen or talked to them for hours before I picked them up!

And how is this for causing more stress? Ric has been accused of robbing a bank in town. Someone saw the picture of the bank robber on tv and called the tip line saying it looked like Ric. Ric wasn't in town. We can prove it. The police showed up at my door at 11:30 on a Saturday night. Woke us up. Now they want a DNA test done. We have nothing to hide. He is willing to submit to one, but what we don't understand is do they actually have the DNA of the bank robber? Is this going to eliminate him or are they just trying to build case? We have a friend who is a criminal lawyer, but he is out of state for a couple of weeks. I have a cousin-in-law (is that even a word? the man married to my cousin) is a lawyer. Not a criminal lawyer, but my aunt suggested we talk to him for some advice. I have sent him an email and hopefully he will call either one of us. Ric hasn't even been in town since the end of June. He hasn't been west of El Paso.

The past couple of days have been very difficult. My heart is heavy. I am worried what this year is going to bring. Last year cancer, this year fighting for his freedom?

Update

2009-06-05T22:22:00.000-07:00

I know I have been lax in writing on my blog. Things here have not been easy. A few weeks ago my sister had her mammogram and she had to go back and get a biopsy. Thankfully it came back negative. I went for mine and had to go back and get a second one and now have to go back in six months to check on an area. No biopsy yet, but I can't rule it out.

I think I mentioned my sister-in-law is pregnant with a little girl who will be born September 16 (she is having a scheduled c-section because of her MS). Little Emma Lynn (I still prefer the middle name of Sue) has a cleft lip. The have done some testing and that seems to be her only issue. I was told today on a scale of 1-10 (10 being the worst) her cleft is about a 1.5 so that is great news. When I am in Hawaii, there is another scheduled ultrasound so I will get to see my newest niece then. I am excited.

My sister's family has all been sick this past week with a stomach virus. The girls, Tink and Princess, both had tubes put in their ears this morning. Hopefully we will have less ear infections to deal with.

My brother-in-law, Brent, is in the hospital with Shingles. What started out as what was thought as pink eye, then a scratched cornea, is really shingles. The upper right side of his face is affected. So he is in the hospital in a lot of pain and on IV antibiotics. He will be in the hospital for a few more days. My sister is worried about Princess since she has not been vaccinated and we don't know is she was exposed while she was in the orphanage. At this point she is expecting her to come down with Chicken Pox.

Ric's niece had a scare this week and had to go to Houston to MD Anderson to get a second opinion. She has brain cancer. This has been going on for a couple of years and we were thankful when the original tumor was removed and she did her chemo and such. Unfortunately, the surgery was not successful in removing all of the cancer so she still has to get checked frequently. It was a huge concern when she was pregnant with her little boy who is about 9 months now. Well, she had a regular scan that showed growth. She went for a second opinion and was told there is no new growth and there is no need for any surgery, chemo, or radiation.

I broke a tooth the other day (although I didn't know I broke it, I just thought the filling that I've had trouble with in the past came loose). So I went to the dentist twice yesterday, once to get it "fixed" at least temporarily, and the other because once the novacaine wore off, I was in so much pain the over the counter meds weren't working. They numbed me up again, removed the temporary which if given time will come loose on it's own so you can put the permanent in. Not so much on the day it was placed. We started out without novacaine. That didn't last long. I received T3s for pain management. Yeah, didn't touch much of the pain. Just made me drowsy and sick. Who knew I couldn't handle codeine? So I spent most of the night sick and in pain. Today I have slept off and on all day and I can manage the pain with ibuprofen for now.

The puppies are doing very well, but are a handful. Chick is taking one to her dad's house, one is going to a good friend of ours in El Paso and finally, the best news, my mom is taking one (who just happens to be my favorite guy). It is so difficult to deal with six dogs (three of whom are puppies), but they are so much fun. I am going to miss them when they are gone. Jenna will be fixed in a few weeks so we don't have to deal with this again....

Ric is doing well in regard to his health. Still no weight gain to speak of, but at least he is back to work part time. He still gets really tired very easily.

So with all that has been going on here and at work with my heavy work load, I am lucky to get on to check the email and other blogs. (I do still read them). Right now things are a bit rocky with Ric and I. I know that we will work things out, but it is stressful for both of us.

So it has been a really crappy few weeks. Although my aunt surprised us and came down for our birthday a couple of weeks ago and for Chick's graduation and confirmation. What a great surprise!

I will try to post more often, but the work load is still way up there. Only 29 days until Chick and I head to Hawaii for a much needed vacation. I am so looking forward to it.

2009-05-20T15:43:00.000-07:00

Lots of stuff going on... some good, some not so good. It will be a while before I can talk about some things.

In other news:

I turn 40 on Saturday. 40! I still feel 21. It can't be.

Chick is graduating from middle school next week. The mom to a high schooler! Aaahhhh!

Chick is also going through Confirmation at our church on Sunday.

My parents are having a party on Saturday to celebrate the month...
May 3 - My aunt's birthday
May 5 - Princess's 2nd birthday
May 10 - My brother and cousin's birthday (although my brother won't be there)
May 14 - My dad's birthday
May 23 - My sister and my birthday
May 24 - Chick's confirmation
May 27 - Chick's graduation
May 30 - Carolyn and Brent's anniversary

May is always a busy month...

The puppies are growing like crazy! They are 4 weeks old and over 5 pounds. I can't weigh them on the little scale anymore. It only goes to 5 pounds, and the regular scale isn't very accurate, especially with wiggly little guys.

I have put out 7 grants in the last month and have 3 more lined up. Tomorrow will be an exceptionally busy day, getting one out. The other 2, well, they aren't even started yet. My life revolves around grants...

I don't want to go into the "not so good" issues right now until I get more information. Hopefully I am making the issue more than it needs to be. Just know that good thoughts could be sent my family's way.

Puppies!

2009-05-03T19:58:00.001-07:00

Chick and DiNozzo

McGee

My favorite, Jethro

DiNozzo and Jethro taking a snooze

They are two weeks old and weigh 3 pounds, each.... They are going to be big boys. McGee's eyes started opening tonight and they are starting to toddle around, looking like a few drunk puppies. They are very cute. Chick is going to get to keep on at her dad's house and I think she is leaning toward DiNozzo. I am partial to Jethro who happens to be the biggest. I wish I could keep him, but three dogs is enough. I am hoping my mom and dad decide to take one and I hope it is Jethro. McGee is cute, and I am waiting to see what type of personality he has. He is definitely the fluffiest of the three. Jethro weighs the most and DiNozzo has the most interesting face.

2009-04-20T15:14:00.001-07:00

The latest at my house...

Pictures will be posted at a later date.

We have puppies. Jenna got "knocked up". I was so very angry that my hubby didn't take responsibility for his dog and have her fixed. She is 9 years old. She had four puppies. Three of which are various shades of tan and they are huge! My Red-headed Step-Child (RHSC) is completely black and very, very small. We are thinking this little one is not going to make it. Right now we are bottle feeding it and hoping that it learns how to suckle. Its back legs and tail are also very odd looking and while it can move it's legs, it is very weak. I took pictures in to the vet today (thankfully very close to work and they are friends of mine) and was told it could still die even with the bottle feeding. So we are trying not to get too attached. Two of the older dogs (Oreo and Edie) have to go on Thursday for check ups and vaccinations so I told them I would bring RHSC in with me since we will most likely be bottle feeding most of the time. Jenna doesn't seem to mind that the little one is not there. She was being a good mama to it and washing it and nudging it up to eat, but it didn't have the strength.

So, anyone want a puppy? Chick has already picked one (if it is a girl) to have at her dad's house, he has approved. I am not sure I do, because of his other dog, but if it means she can keep one and I don't have to take care of it.... One of Chick's friends will probably take another. I have yet to confirm with her mother, but from what I understand. So we potentially have two available. Keeping in mind that RHSC may not survive and may be a special needs puppy. Who knows. We may end up having to keep it, but if so, I am running away... Just kidding.

Other than that, it has been business as usual. I have been extremely busy at work and am only taking a short break to share my fun news.

2009-04-08T15:15:00.000-07:00

Four weeks since I posted. Ahh, the joys of life.... I am back into the major grant mode again. I have four due in 10 days. Crazy stuff here at work. Then I have two more due in May. We are preparing for our big grant due in February (we start early, this is over 500 pages of grant writing bliss). But.... I have something to look forward to. Chick and I are going to Hawaii to visit my brother and his family in July. We haven't got the tickets yet because the Boss hasn't signed my vacation request (I want three weeks, she may not want me to take that long, so I may have to cut it down to two weeks).

I spoke to my step-son today. He is in Kauai getting ready to head back to Ft. Bliss. However, he is saying he may be back in Kauai in July and is even thinking of having his lovely wife, Mattie come along. The he told me he has a friend who flies for Hawaiian Air, out of Phoenix and he is going to try to get us tickets for really cheap. Woo hoo! What a great kid. He told me today that Ric told it he had to kiss up to me today cause I was having a rough week. Plus, if he is in Hawaii when we are there, he is going to see about coming to Oahu to see the Chick and I. Ha ha, Chick will be so pleased. She loves him, but doesn't want him to know, and he picks on her, you know, the I don't like my brother/sister thing? Yeah, right!

So why is my week bad. Well, it isn't really. It is just so busy with grants, very stressful. And yesterday I forgot to take my blood pressure medicine. By 2:00 I was having a headache, and nausea, and just feeling generally terrible. I went home, took my pill and laid in bed the rest of the night. Big mistake. The pills are take are a "water" pills. I wasn't laying down enough for the blood pressure to come down. It fluctuated most of the night. And of course, I didn't get much sleep, being up and down and all. So this morning I was still not feeling 100% (only 2 hours of sleep, elevated blood pressure will do that). I took my pill this morning (probably not a good idea since it had only been 16 hours since I took the last one), but I wanted to make sure that I could take one in the morning and not have to be up and down all night. My BP is much better this afternoon (115/76), although my heart rate is on the high end of "normal" (resting is almost 80). I am just exhausted.

But, my hubby called and said, instead of having to cook and clean up this evening, he is going to take us out to dinner. Yes! The dish fairy doesn't have to come to my house tonight... oh wait, that's me. Yes! I don't have to do the dishes tonight!

So I am leaving work early again today, hoping to get back on track tomorrow.

If you don't see anything on here for awhile, it isn't that I am ignoring everyone, it is just that I am drowning in a sea of grants.... Grant Hell if you will. :)

2009-03-05T14:46:00.000-08:00

This wonderful friend....

went to be an angel today. Marti has been struggling with colon cancer for many years. I am very sad.

Another sigh of relief...

2009-03-02T20:40:00.000-08:00

Ric's PET scan came back clear, one more time. My heart feels lighter tonight. I am thankful.

Marti remains in the hospital with pneumonia. Please continue praying for her. And continue praying for Richard, that he has enough healing and strength to make some more memories for his family.

I spoke to my sister-in-law today and she and the baby are fine. I also talked to LJ since it was his 12th birthday. Oh my goodness, time flies. I hope I can get to see them later in the summer. We will see what the finances tell us when Tadzia is closer to her due date, once we actually find out what that is

Prayer

2009-03-01T18:02:00.000-08:00

Our sermon at church today was all about prayer. My friend with colon cancer is in the hospital with pneumonia. She asked Pastor David yesterday if he still believed in a miracle for her. The answer is a resounding YES. It may not be the miracle we want, complete healing, but God listens to us and knows. We heard of a young 26 year old woman who is friends with someone in church who passed away two weeks ago from throat cancer. Ric and I just held hands and told each other we were lucky. Kori's husband is hanging in there. They are planning a trip to Disney World to make memories while he is still able to get around. Prayers are answered every day. Another woman from church has breast cancer, underwent surgery, and was told she would not have to go through chemo. Praise God. Sometimes it seems as if the cure is worse than the disease. I know in our case, it was a toss up, but with Ric being cancer free right now, we are still dealing with the aftermath of the chemo and radiation. It is an ongoing and very slow process.

We were lucky. We know it. There are days when things seem "back to normal". We argue, we disagree, and we love, just like any other day before the cancer turned our world upside down. But now, when we get back into those old habits, it is very easy for one of us to say stop. We don't need to argue. We may have been together for nine years, but we've only been married for two and a half and one of those years was taken from us by the cancer. It is so much easier to see the daily blessings in our lives because we know they may not be there tomorrow.

I know Marti is struggling. She doesn't want to see anyone right now. No, that isn't right. It isn't that she doesn't want to see them, it is that she is too exhausted and tired. She has fought for years with this cancer. She knows it is a matter of time. Are we still praying for a miracle? By all means, yes. Will it be the miracle of a complete cure for her, for Richard? Probably not, but God knows, the miracle will be when they meet him face to face and are no longer in pain. Do I want this to happen so soon? No, I want Marti to live for a long time. I want Richard to live for a long time for his family.

Giving up is not an option. God didn't allow us to find cures for diseases that would have been an immediate death sentence only 20 years ago. No, he gave us the ability to experiment and learn and to find cures. I pray every day for a cure for cancer. I want so much to not have been thrown down that path, kicking and screaming, and cursing God. I didn't want Ric to be struggling months after his treatment has ended. I didn't want to fell anxious when his PET scan was scheduled. I don't want to feel terrified that the call will come and we will have to start this whole process over again.

We were lucky. But we didn't get through this alone. We have become much more in tune with each other and our faith in God and the doctors. Because without them and our families, we would be lost. God hears our prayers. He answers our prayers, maybe not in the way we want him to, but he does. Kori's blog about her life with Richard and the boys will forever be a testament to her love of God and her family. Richard will leave a legacy when it is his time. Maybe more people will want to help find cures for cystic fibrosis and cancer.

We were lucky, and I thank God every day for giving us one more day together.

Updates...

2009-02-27T09:57:00.000-08:00

Ric's PET scan is this morning. In fact, he is in there right now beginning the process. I am nervous, anxious, and just down right worried. Will the cancer be back? I pray that it is not.

My cousin's scans came back great. No lymphoma. He goes back in a few months for another scan/scope.

My friend, Marti, isn't doing so well with her cancer.

Chick and I both have dental appointments this afternoon. Hers for a check up and mine to fix the stupid filling that is loose, again. We then go to a booth sale for GS cookies. Yum!

The best news I have had this week is that I am going to be an auntie again! My brother and sister-in-law had a bit of a surprise and she is pregnant. We are anxious about her MS because she has to go off all medications so she will be considered high risk. At this point we are not sure how far along she is. When she first told us it was about 10 weeks. When she went to the doctor on Tuesday she was told it may be as far along as 16-20 weeks. She goes for another appointment next week and her ultrasound is in a couple of weeks. I am working on the names for the baby, putting in my thoughts... :) We have come up with some real great ones!

2009-02-17T14:51:00.000-08:00

Ahhh, the joys of dental work. It wasn't too long ago that I spent a small fortune on my back molar. Today was the tooth next to it. Actually, I didn't have to spend that much, only $75 (ha!) The filling that was there has been loose for a few weeks. I promised myself that the tax return money that I get is going toward the Chick's teeth. I am a bad mom. She hasn't been to the dentist in 3 years. She was seeing a pediatric dentist for all her problems early on, but it was costing a fortune, much more than my teeth. Last year's tax return was earmarked for her too. Unfortunately, my bad teeth came up again and I had to spend large amounts of money for them to fix something that should have been fixed years ago.

Anyway, since this visit only cost me $75, I made an appointment for her. Hopefully my tax money will be back by then, because I can just imagine what it is going to cost me. Her teeth are fairly straight now, but a her bottom jaw is crowded and starting to move teeth into interesting angles. Thankfully, she has had no problems in the last couple of years so maybe we will just get by with a good cleaning... okay, I doubt that. I just want her to have a pretty smile and hopefully bad teeth skip a generation or two.

Meanwhile, I am sitting here with a totally numb mouth and my cheek itches, but I don't want to scratch because it is numb and who knows what kind of look I will be going for tomorrow if I scratch too hard.

Thankfully, Dr. T is a good dentist and he made it very painless. :-D

2009-02-15T13:33:00.001-08:00

Ric's blood work came back normal. Well, the protein levels were still low, but his thyroid tests were okay. I think it is just going to have to take some time for him to get his weight up. It has been one year since our lives changed forever. One of the nurses told him it could take two years or more before he gets his strength back. he was pretty discouraged since it has been a year since the diagnosis, although not quite that long since the weight just slipped off his body. I have noticed the past couple of weeks that he has definitely been in a much better mood. Hopefully he has found a good "place" and can accept the long wait for his weight and strength can come back.

My cousin is getting another scope this week to make sure everything is okay. His PET scan was clean, but they want to make sure everything is okay. We are keeping our fingers crossed and are very hopefully that he will be fine.

My friend who has colon cancer is not doing well. We have known for awhile that the cancer has spread to the lungs, but she is now on oxygen and no longer comes to church. It is sad for everyone. Her daughter came to church today and was having a bit of a hard time. Those bad moments come and go, but there are still some happy moments. I know she was very happy to hear that Ric's tests came back good She told me later that she wanted to clap when she heard that.

I sometimes wonder why some people have to suffer so much with the cancer. It was so hard for Ric and I to deal with his cancer, and we are profoundly thankful that his cancer is "gone". We are thankful that his mother's cancer is in remission. But we have friends whose path is not as "smooth". Their cancer has not responded well to the treatments and it is so hard for me to not be angry, even though I know that they are getting the best care possible.

I was thinking the other day about all the research the University does for cancer, including my boss. I get very irritated by people who say using animals for cancer research is wrong. It is understandable that people don't want to see cute little ratties being subjected to treatments ,but you know, if it weren't for this type of research, Ric's cancer would have been a death sentence. His mother would have died from the lymphoma. My uncle would not have lived for years with mesothelioma. I wish that a cure for all cancers would be found. That we didn't have to watch our loved ones struggling with their illnesses.

I just seem to be having one of those days.

2009-02-09T09:30:00.000-08:00

We had a busy, yet uneventful weekend. Just lots of running around, nothing exciting except Chick and her friend got their promotion dresses. Beautiful!

This week is going to be busy with running around, work, and picking up Girl Scout cookies on Saturday. The joys of being a leader... Thankfully, everyone knows not to fill my car with Thin Mints unless they want complaints. I hate Thin Mints, I hate the smell of Thin Mints. I know, totally un-American. Give me Trefoils and I am a happy girl. Ooooh, or the Cafe Cookies that they had a few years ago. I loved those!

What is your favorite kind of Girl Scout cookie?

2009-02-06T10:18:00.000-08:00

My cousin's results came back and the PET scan was clear. Good news. They are doing another scope sometime soon, I don't know when, though.

Ric's appointment with the Rad Onc yesterday went well. They did some blood work to check his thyroid. Dr. M thinks the radiation may have knocked his thyroid out of whack so his checking on that. We know his protein levels are still going to be in the tank, but hopefully there won't be any surprised.

Dr. M wants him to be eating 3-4,000 calories per day. That is a lot! This is because, fully clothed, wearing his work books, he weighed 128. Take off four pounds for the clothes and shoes and it looks like he lost a little. He is eating, I can promise that, the problem is, he gets tired long before he finishes a meal.

His salivary glands are beginning to stir, at least a little bit, but not enough that it makes it easy for him to chew or swallow. There are a bunch of little issues from the radiation that won't be resolved any time soon.

The doctor was a bit surprised that he hasn't bounced back yet, because he was so healthy before. It was just the huge weight loss and then not being able to eat. We have picked up a different type of protein shake with more calories to see if we can't jump start his metabolism a little more.

And, more good news, Chick and her friend made the colorguard team at the high school, so next year, they will both be having some fun with this activity. They had a great time yesterday at the try-outs and because the team posted their results and that was the quickest way to find out if they had made it, I brought her friend home with us for dinner. That required some fast acting on my part when we got home because her friend is Muslim and can't eat pork. Guess what we were having for dinner? So we had pork and I had a couple of small steaks, so she had that. Then we drove back over to the high school and I waited with the windows rolled down, cause it was so nice last night, and they were both squealing like stuck pigs (probably not a great reference for a Muslim) but anyway, they both came running and jumping and squealing My ears will never be the same.

2009-02-03T07:32:00.000-08:00

The grant is done! Wooo hooo! Say a little prayer today for my cousin who is having his PET scan done today. We are hoping that everything comes back normal.

Ric has been home since Saturday and things have been going pretty good. He and Chick are getting along really well, although she was moody this morning (she is obviously not a morning person!)

Chick has been really busy with school this week. I have a feeling the next few months, until promotion, are going to be this way. She is already scoping out dresses for me to look at. She found two this weekend when she went to the mall with her dad and her friend. I think she told me one of the dresses was over $100. Yea, I don't think so. It will be a busy week for her, she has practice for the musical every day after school this week and she has to go over to the high school because she wants to try out for the colorguard. Plus, homework and Girl Scouts on Friday. I am surprised she has been in a pretty good mood up to now. Of course, I probably jinxed myself and she will be a brat the rest of the week!

2009-01-29T09:36:00.000-08:00

I have been pretty quiet these past few weeks, not that there isn't anything going on, there is always something happening around here. There have been a few health issues going on that have had me thinking and spend time with family and respecting their feelings on information getting out. Now that the key people have been notified, I just want everyone to say a prayer for my cousin who has lymphoma. He is going for a scan on Tuesday next week (it was supposed to be yesterday, but got canceled). From what I understand, the doctors got the lesion, but they want to make sure they got everything. I am not going to say anymore because I don't want it to be a huge deal, just a quick prayer on Tuesday morning for good results.

Chick is busier and busier as the school year is coming to a close in a couple of months. I had to go to a parent meeting to discuss the transfer to High School next year. Interestingly only about 40 people showed up so it was short and sweet. It was basically to discuss the math and science curriculum as well as this year's promotion ceremony and important dates. She will receive the information to sign up for classes in March and we will get down to business. Thankfully, parents need to sign their registration forms so they don't sign up for all fun classes.

She is in the middle of practice for their school musical and has late days a couple of times a week. She is having a blast with that and I can't wait to see her in the play. She is also interested in joining the color guard at the high school next year, so next week she has two afternoons that she has to go over to the high school for a practice and try-out. Surprisingly her friend, D, who is a sax player, wants to try out for the color guard too. Chick is thrilled. She said the high school kids told them that they will be going to Hawaii and the Macy's parade next year.

I have also been really busy with my grant. It is so stressful this time of year. I am hoping that next week things quiet down a bit so I can get some other stuff off my desk that has been piling up the past month and half.

I will really try to be better about posting more, just be patient...

2009-01-25T16:17:00.000-08:00

I was just saying I haven't posted in what, forever? Yes, this is true. Work is crazy, I've been out the last couple of days with a migraine. Thankfully that seems to be gone.

I have been stalking everyone, just not commenting or posting here so much. Sorry, I have to keep up with your lives you know.

Ric has an appointment on February 9 with the Radiation Oncologist to schedule his next PET scan. Since they told him in September the cancer was gone, not "in remission" but gone, I am going to go into this with a hopeful heart. The effects of the treatments are still going strong. He still can't taste (thanks, chemo and radiation), he still has no salivary glands (thanks, radiation) so he still hasn't gained any weight back. I take that back, last he checked he was 128, so 3 pounds. Why is it, I can put on weight by just thinking about food and he struggles even though he eats as much as he can given the circumstances? Not fair... He still looks live a victim of starvation, and I look at pictures and wonder if he will ever get back to normal. He always used to look slightly younger than his age, now he looks 20 years older than he really is.

So, let's see, I promised some pictures of Rocks, Ropes, Ice, and a crazy friend. I know it was weeks ago, but I haven't forgotten.

Rocks and Ropes (because the two go together). We took Chick's girl scout troop to an indoor rock climbing place. They had a blast. Well, most did. My un-athletic daughter (takes after her mom) made it about half way up before deciding she wasn't sure this was a great idea. We will try again another time.

Ice and a Crazy Friend go together, too. Chick invited her friend to go with us to the hockey game. There was an autograph party and Crazy Friend (I need to think of a better name for her, because she really isn't crazy) had the guys sign her phone.

The girls with one of our favorite players... Chick made a comment about how, even though he obviously showered, the smell of rink sweat still lingers. She wanted me to smell her shirt to confirm. I don't think so. Teenager sweat ain't none to pleasant either and it was a long day...

Anyway, I am going to go pick up Ric and make dinner for the family. Lots of gravy in this house... and I wonder why I can't lose... actually, I don't even like the stuff.

2009-01-15T20:18:00.000-08:00

I am tired of grants... My life revolves around grants this time of year. Whenever someone asks me to do something at work that is not related to the grant, I have to tell them it goes to the bottom of the pile and may not get done until sometime in February. I could work 24 hours a day, 7 days a week and still have things to do with these grants.

So what has my life been like the past few weeks that I haven't posted... Well, I can't think of anything that I've done that didn't involve grants. So, I guess you could say it's been pretty boring.

Chick is in a play at school so she has been going to rehearsals almost every day. The highlight of our ride home (all two minutes of it) is hearing her stories about the kids in the play. She and her friend D are the Magic Carpet. Not a speaking part, but she still gets to do some singing with everyone. I can't wait until the performances. I am even missing a hockey game for this...

She has also finished her requirements for her Silver Award and is going to start on the actual project soon. First she has to make a proposal to the church for what she wants to do, then she will need to get busy doing some fund raising to get the donations for the things she needs to complete the project. I am the adviser in our troop for the Silver Awards and she and another girl are the only two at this point of their journey. I am not particularly fond of the other girl's project, I don't think that it says helping the community loud enough, but she is putting a lot of work into it and will be beneficial to some. If this was a Gold Award project, it definitely would not qualify. Thankfully, all of Chick's projects (Bronze and Silver) have been really well thought out and have helped others in our community. Believe it or not, she already has ideas for her Gold Award....

Ric's next doctor's appointment is February 9. I am glad that it will be after the next couple of grants go out so I have a little breathing room so I can go with him. They aren't going to do much but check him out, make sure he is gaining weight (not so much), check his throat inside and out to make sure there is nothing visible and then schedule his next PET scan for March. Right now I am okay with things and am not too stressed about it. Probably because I don't have the time. But when it comes down to the PET scan I will probably be a nervous wreck.

I am off to take a pill and try to get a good nights sleep without my mind going crazy thinking of all the things that I should have done today and didn't get around to. Most nights the past couple of weeks I have only gotten about three hours of sleep because my poor mind won't shut down. I feel exhausted all the time. To top it off, everyone here has been sick and thankfully, knock on wood, Chick, Ric and I have not gotten it, which is surprising for Chick since she is around my parents a lot and my dad had the crud pretty bad. One of my co-workers was sick this week and today I was feeling not so great around lunch time. In fact, I started to eat a hamburger, got halfway through it and got really nauseated. All I could think was, please, not for another few weeks, then I can be sick and stay home. Right now, I have to go to work. I have to stay healthy. So, I am going to see what I can do about getting a good night's sleep tonight and don't tell anyone, but Saturday, I am not going to set the alarm clock....

2009-01-05T10:46:00.000-08:00

I am playing catch-up at work. I tried to avoid the email and phone while I was off work. That didn't work out so well. The Boss called quite a few times and there were always emergencies. Because of some bad information from another department the two grants that we were frantically working on before the break did not get accepted. It comes down to what I say they told me and them trying to cover their #$@!@#. I wish I had written the person's name down who gave me the bad information. Anyway, The Boss is very upset about it. At least she isn't mad at me about it.

In the meantime, I am playing "clear my desk off" today so I can get to work on the big grant that is due on Feb 1. So, while I am not necessarily going to be updating on a regular basis here, I am thinking of everyone and checking out a few blogs if time allows.

2008-12-15T20:26:00.000-08:00

I am such a bad blogger.... It has been a week since I last posted. But I have a great excuse, it is called work. We got our two grants out last week. I have one more this week, plus working on the non-competing grant and another due February 1.

But enough about that, let me tell you about this...

These were my Secret Santa Shindig presents from a Tattooed Minivan Mom. Thank you! The note in with the presents said this was a warm-up care package. I get cold very easily (it must be my thin Arizona blood). Ric used to produce mass amounts of heat, but not anymore since he lost so much weight. Anyway, I got a nice warm flannel blanket that Chick has already decided is so nice and toasty she wants to use it, but I am selfish and told her no way. I got some nice warm fuzzy socks, perfect for the cooler evenings. And to top it off, some mocha coffee and hot cocoa mix to put in the nice big mug with a little snack of hot cocoa flavored Hershey kisses and homemade chocolate chip toffee shortbread cookies. I am in heaven and I am not going to share with my darling Chick. Okay, maybe a little sharing. Thank you, TMM! I love everything!

If I get a chance I will post some pictures of our weekend... To give you a hint it consisted of ice, rocks, ropes, and a crazy friend of Chick's.

2008-12-05T07:54:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I came into work thinking, I have so much too do. I made the comment to my co-worker that I was glad it was Wednesday because that would mean having three full days to get all the stuff done that has been coming at me. She looked at me really funny and said, "Susie, it is Thursday." I think the first word out of my mouth was not a very nice one. That meant I only had two days to do everything.

Of course, today, I am thankful it is Friday and even though I have to work this weekend, Chick will be with her dad and I don't actually have to come into the office.

Who would have thought that I would be disappointed that it was Thursday instead of Wednesday? Certainly not me.

And last night Chick lost one of baby teeth. She has only one more to go... You would think at 13 she would be done, but she didn't start getting teeth until she was 13 months old, so I guess this is par for the course. The last tooth isn't wiggly - at all. It could be awhile.

2008-12-01T14:05:00.000-08:00

Princess and Tink are hilarious... Poor Chick. I felt bad for her having to drag those two beauties across the carpet by their feet (or hands, depending). Sorry for the rug burn Tink, maybe next time you will wear the overalls your mommy picked out. And cute little girls whose pants slide down, should not moon their family. Pictures were taken to use as blackmail in later years, but will not be posted on this site. It will go with the one of the completely naked BubbaJ in my special hiding place only to be taken out at later dates to get what I want from them.... Waaa haaaa haaaa haaa!

What was I thinking going to Black Friday sales? Okay, besides saving money, which I did. As Ric would say, I would have saved more if I had stayed home. That and I wouldn't have had to deal with the crowds. I think we stood in line at Kohls (cute, cute, cute outfit for Chick, BTW) longer than we were actually shopping.

A child who is only 13 and skinny should not be wearing a B cup, I'm just saying... That and when she picks matching underwear, you need to make sure that it is age appropriate. A 13 year old doesn't need to be picking up thongs to wear... Okay, is really picky about her clothes so she wouldn't wear thongs anyway because they would just be out of her comfort zone, but some of the panties she picked up were, oh my, no way in hell. That and does she really need a push up bra at 13? I think not...

When Gram asks if I want to help decorate the church for Christmas, remind myself that the answer is no, I do not want to help decorate the church.... especially if there are a bunch of little kids running around screaming. And, really, I don't want to decorate my house, why would I want to decorate someone else's? It did look beautiful though. And why was Liz so surprised that baby Jesus wasn't in the manger?

Thanks Pastor Dave for scaring the pants off us (okay not really, but close) when you had all those people jump up and shout "Time's up" at the end of the sermon. Yes, I know it was part of the story and it worked well, but next time, make sure you let me know. I won't sit right in front of David. He has a loud voice....

I think my small tree is enough this year and I really do not want to have to get the big tree out and get all the ornaments down, just to have to put it all away in a couple of weeks, so the small tree is enough. If anyone wants to help me decorate and put away, that may be a different story, but since no one is volunteering, please don't complain that we only have a small tree. Thank you.

2008-11-29T18:11:00.001-08:00

What Your Home Says About You

You come across as somewhat intellectual. You can be quite insightful at times.

Your hygiene is passable, but you may be hiding some dirty secrets.

You are a very domestic person. You enjoy decorating, cooking, and making things homey.

You are a very nurturing person. You find meaning in taking care of others.

You feel settled in your life. You have enough time to focus on little details.

You are a very self sufficient person. You can get along well without much help.

Your friends see you as accommodating, peaceful, and forgiving.

What Does Your Home Say About You?

What Your Cupcake Says About You

At parties, you are energetic and outgoing. You really feel comfortable in a crowd.

You have absolutely no restraint in your life. You live life with reckless abandon.

The most important thing in your life is love.

You are laid back, flexible, and easy to get along with. To know you is to care for you.

The Cupcake Test

2008-11-29T13:15:00.001-08:00

Ask me how much of my Christmas shopping is done? Go ahead....

I have five more presents to buy and only a few things left at home to wrap! I am so proud... I am going to wait for Ric to help me with the last few things since they are for his family, but I do have his grandkids done... Thankfully, I have gathered a few things for the kids all year.

Almost every year I have a family calendar made for my family, this year I got it done. Last year I didn't have enough pictures of LJ and Mary so I didn't do one. I didn't want to have just Chick, Bubba, and Tink (Princess wasn't here yet). However, this year, I made sure to take some pictures of the LJ and Mary. I think it came out really nice and am just waiting for them to arrive so I can wrap those. Each year, Chick and Tink have a picture of some sort where they are dancing. We have called those pictures the Dancing Aardvarks. Where that came from, I have no real clue, but here is next year's calendar picture including the newest member.

Carolyn bought Tink and Pincess these adorable dresses for Christmas. Tink was looking at her angel ornament that is "decilate". Bubba J didn't particularly want his picture taken... thus the blank look on his face. Princess is always willing to have her picture taken...

Since Princess loves to have her photo taken, here are two cute ones from this weekend. The first is from Thanksgiving day. She and I were out playing ball. She is such a cutie!

This one is from today. We went and decorated the church for Advent and Princess just look so cute sitting with the poinsettias.

She is really starting to mimic words more and more lately. Especially if you say them in a sing-song voice. She loves to eat and says "meat" all the time. Gram has been trying to get her to say "Gram" for a while now. Today she actually repeated us saying it. She also said Mumpie (my dad) and Bubba (me).

Now, if I could only get the other kids to allow me to take good pictures of them (especially Bubba J).

2008-11-28T00:03:00.000-08:00

Oh, how I wish I could stay asleep for longer than a few hours at a time... I have been suffering with heartburn most nights and it is so bad it wakes me up and then I can't get back to sleep. A couple of months ago the doctor gave me Prevacid and it helped. He gave me samples and a prescription (which I never had filled). I kept both on my counter, Ric moved the prescription, actually he used the back of it to make a note and set it off somewhere. I finally found it this evening after a frantic search so when the pharmacy opens in the morning, guess what I will be doing?

We had a great Thanksgiving at my sister's house. We headed up at around 10:00 and hit a pretty bad storm about half way there. Visibility was practically zero. It was a very quick moving storm and we got out of it fairly quickly. There was an accident on the other side of the storm, but it was minor. We made it about a mile from their house and Carolyn called to tell us Brent's brother had been in an accident outside of the town we live in. We think they got caught in the same storm. Thankfully he was by himself, towing another vehicle. Brent's dad was in front of in one car and his mom, wife and baby were in the car behind. Unfortunately, the ones in back saw him lose control and flip his car. Thankfully, he got out on his own. He was taken to University Medical as a precaution and was released after some x-rays and scans. No injuries... They didn't make it to Carolyn's for dinner, so we had lots and lots of food, but what a small price to pay for something could have been so devastating. Ty's jeep was totaled, the vehicle he was towing (they call it the mutt, it is an old Army jeep) just had a broken windshield. Ty walked away. Yet another thing to be thankful for!

Ric had a great Thanksgiving with his family. He said he even tasted his first bite of stuffing, which is a plus since his taste buds are still pretty much no-existent. The rest of the meal he didn't taste. There are occasions when he gets a real taste of something, but it isn't often. He spent the day with his family and hopefully got some good pictures. I missed him, but am glad that he got this opportunity since it has been a while since he spent a holiday with his family.

Chick is still awake as well. She says she went to bed, but who knows. I was asleep for a few hours. I told her she had to go to bed since we had a busy day tomorrow (really today). Carolyn, Brent, and the kids came down with us since Brent's weekend plans with Ty were obviously changed. Carolyn was supposed to come down later today with the kids. So we left their house earlier than we had originally planned. Anyway, Gram wants to hit a few stores tomorrow. Something I am not particularly looking forward to, but who am I to miss a day of shopping, and who knows, maybe I will get some deals.

I told Chick we were going shopping and she wanted to know what time. I told her Kohls opens at 4 am. She said if we were doing that it was a waste of time for her to go to sleep now. Yeah... I don't think so. I am not going shopping at 4 am.

I am just starting to get rid of the heartburn, a combination of a bunch of tums, some crackers, and sitting up-right. I am hoping I don't have to prop myself up when I go to bed because that just doesn't provide a good sleep.

Anyway, I hope you all had a great Thanksgiving. I know that we have much to be thankful for this year and especially today with Ty. It could have been so much worse. Roz and "Wiley" (their nickname for my blog) could have been in the car with him. He could have been seriously injured or killed, not walked away without any injuries. Dinner was certainly not as important as him being okay. The loss of his jeep is nothing compared to losing him. We are indeed thankful to God for watching over our family.

And one more post...

2008-11-27T01:44:00.000-08:00

before I head to bed at the ungodly hour of 3 am... Ric isn't making it home for Thanksgiving, but he is with his family. He ended up in Dallas with his run and they couldn't get him home, but his sister lives in Tyler so he headed there for the holiday. His parents will be there as well as his nieces and their hubbies and baby S. I am glad that he will be able to spend some time with them since his parents haven't seen him since the surgery in February. This will give him time to see for himself that his mom is doing okay after her treatments (she gets her scan in December so we will know then if the cancer is gone). I am jealous, he is getting to love on cute little S.

Cinnamon isn't doing great tonight. Chick had her out earlier and noticed she was acting oddly. I keep telling her that she was the same age as Nutmeg and she's been gone for a while so we need to be prepared. She is still eating and drinking so that is good, but she is walking oddly. Not like she caught her foot or anything, just hunched over and not particularly comfortable. Right now she is sleeping in her little bed, but she did look up when I went to check on her, so she is doing okay for the moment. Hopefully it is nothing serious and she will be okay, but I just don't want to have to deal with a weepy child on Thanksgiving.

So now, I am off to try to go back to sleep since I have to get up early to drive to my sister's house 100+ miles away tomorrow. Well, I am not driving, Gram is driving, but still, it makes for a long day.

I hope everyone has a great Thanksgiving, I know I am thankful for so many things this year (at least the past couple of months)!

2008-11-27T01:07:00.001-08:00

I took Chick to see Twilight today. It was good. I am still not convinced about all the choices they had for the actors, but Chick says they were good choices. I was disappointed they didn't spend a little more time on Jacob, but it is a book shortened into movie format so some cutting was inevitable. Some of the dialogue was really stupid. I can't say it any other way. There were just a few parts that really were either poorly written or just bad acting. Either way, those couple of scenes were distracting. For some reason I felt the first part of the movie was slow. Since I've read all the books and I know what happens, I was disappointed to know it will be two more years before the next one comes out. After all, the actors who play the characters won't stay the same age... Overall, I will give the movie a B-. It stayed fairly true to the book although there were some pretty large omissions. The acting was fair. The actor/character portrayals were okay in some instances, although I was really disappointed with Jacob and I pictured Carlisle and Esme to be a bit older in my mind, not quite so close in age to the "younger" characters. I recognized the Carlisle actor from somewhere, but can't for the life of me think of who he is. Both my mom and I said he looked really familiar. The scenes seemed to be really dark all the time. I know that it is supposed to be set in an area that doesn't see a lot of sunny days, but it was so gloomy in some parts. The guy who played James was excellent. We went to a matinee so the price wasn't too bad. Chick is no longer considered a child, so we paid the full price for her. Gram got the only discounted price this time... It was worth the cost for the matinee, although if I had seen it at the regular price, I wouldn't have thought so.

It is kind of like the Harry Potter movies... they were okay, but not as good as the book.

Votes needed!

2008-11-27T00:41:00.000-08:00

My friend Karen has been participating in Atlanta's Biggest Loser Competition. This week she is on the block and needs your votes to stay in the competition. So far she has been up against six women. This is the first time she has been up, only because there are only two women left. This is what she wrote on the ABL blog:

Wow, what a journey this has been. Now, I find myself relying on votes instead of my weight loss results to stay in this competition. Before I knew what to expect...now, I'm asking the viewing public, my family, friends, colleagues, and their friends to vote to keep me in. I'd really love to stay in this competition and take it to the next level against the men.

I couldn't have accomplished this lifestyle change without the opportunity provided by 11 Alive, Adrenaline Fitness & Wellness, and Good Measure Meals. These tools have given me the ammunition I needed to get back on track and off the couch! It's amazing what I've accomplished in such a short amount of time and I plan to keep up the good work.

It's been quite a year with the deployment of my son to Iraq and the stress that goes along with that. I'm happy to report that he is back in the states and on his way to Atlanta to spend the Thanksgiving holiday with me! What a gift! I'm sure others can relate that sending a loved one off to war is one of the most difficult things to do. I pray each day to keep our men and women safe and bring them home soon.

Thank you all for your support and Happy Thanksgiving to you and your families.

Karen

And this is what she sent to all of us in an email:

Hi everyone,

As many of you know, I've been a contestant in Atlanta's version of The Biggest Loser. Thus far, I've lost over 30 lbs and have retained the lead (percentage) in weight loss among the Blue Team (the women's team). Now that we're down to the top two women, I need your online vote to remain in the competition and compete with the last standing member of the men's team.

Wow, I'm feeling great – have renewed energy and my core has strengthened considerably. At the beginning of this competition, I couldn't run two minutes – now I'm running 20 and then working out for an hour followed by classes.

You can vote online once per day per computer (beginning this afternoon) at: http://www.11alive.com/life/contests/atlantas_biggest_loser/

The best news of all this Thanksgiving is that my son, Brian, who has been in Iraq since March is now back in the states and is on his way here from Mississippi to spend the Thanksgiving weekend with me. This will be the best Thanksgiving ever!

If you take a look at the results, you will see that Karen has lost the highest percentage of body fat! I am so proud of how well she is doing. I can't wait to see "after" pictures. Actually, I know she will be coming home when Brian gets married and I can't wait to see her in person!

Please go and vote for her. I know she will have some tough competition from the winner of the men's team. They are neck and neck with percentage of body fat lost. So go and vote! Please!

Christmas Quiz

2008-11-25T09:55:00.001-08:00

If you are reading this, you've been tagged....

1. Wrapping paper or gift bags? wrapping paper, unless it is something that is really oddly shaped.
2. Real tree or Artificial? I would love to have a real tree, but that would mean I would have to remember to water it. We have two artificial trees (a little one and an ugly one).
3. When do you put up the tree? I think last year I put them up a couple weeks before Christmas. I put the little one up this year already, although it isn't decorated yet.
4. When do you take the tree down? Usually before I go back to work after the holidays.
5. Do you like eggnog? Oh, yummy, yes!
6. Favorite gift received as a child? My dad made my sister and I a doll house one year. We still have that thing...
7. Hardest person to buy for? Usually my dad or Ric
8. Easiest person to buy for? Chick this year.
9. Do you have a nativity scene? Yes, I have the Fontanini nativity. I love it because it can't get broken and the pieces are so beautiful. I will have to take a picture...
10. Mail or email Christmas cards? Mail
11.Worst Christmas gift you ever received? I can't think of any
12. Favorite Christmas Movie? Miracle on 34th Street
13. When do you start shopping for Christmas? December 26, I love the after Christmas sales. Then I don't start again until September or November
14. Have you ever recycled a Christmas present? no
15. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas? Mom's shortbread
16. Lights on the tree? Yes, white on the little tree, multi-colored on the big tree
17. Favorite Christmas song? Silent Night
18. Travel at Christmas or stay home? I stay in town and travel to my parents' house
19. Can you name all of Santa's reindeer's? Yes
20. Angel on the tree top or a star? The little tree has a bow, the big tree has an angel
21. Open the presents Christmas Eve or morning? Christmas jammies on Christmas Eve, everything else, Christmas morning
22. Most annoying thing about this time of the year? Crazy shoppers
23. Favorite ornament theme or color? The little tree has Christmons and gold ornaments. The big tree is a mix.
24. Favorite for Christmas dinner? We usually have turkey or ham.
25. What do you want for Christmas this year? I have nothing on my list. I just want to make sure that Chick has a good Christmas and that we all stay healthy next year.

2008-11-25T09:31:00.000-08:00

Chick, Gram, and I are going to see Twilight tomorrow. At least that is the plan. There is a church service tomorrow evening, and then Thursday we are going to Carolyn and Brent's for Thanksgiving. We have to come back on Thursday because of the dogs, but Carolyn and the kids will be down here this weekend so we can spend some time with them.

I am going to try to get some more of my Christmas shopping done this weekend (probably not Friday, just because I know it will be crazy).... unless I get up at some ungodly hour and do the Black Friday sales... Kohl's opens at 4 am. I am not that crazy (unless it is the day after Christmas).

Chick is going to get a Wii this year. I have been looking at prices. They are crazy, but she has not asked for any type of game system, ever. Well, with the exception of her Game Boy that is now someplace in the garage. She only ever used it on trips and stuff, it was never something that she had to sit and play constantly like LJ. Besides, since the Wii is more active than passive, it will be good for her. Okay, and me too. I have to get her the system and she says we need a couple more controllers and she would really like another game, but she is not sure what game. So if anyone has any ideas, let me know. I will see if I can afford one for Christmas for her. I would love to get the Wii Fit, but that will definitely have to wait. I don't think that should be a present for her, a skinny, 13-year old, when it would be her mother, an overweight, over 21 year old who would be using it more. :)

So everyone, have a great Thanksgiving and I will hopefully post some pictures of our family day later this weekend.

Almonds, Chocolate, Peanut Butter, Oh My!

2008-11-24T12:22:00.000-08:00

While browsing around at lunch time today, I found this opportunity. It is for the Flat Belly Diet. Now, I don't think I can recall a time when I've had a flat belly, certainly not in the past, oh, how old is Chick? thirteen years... I still have what some would affectionately call the "baby fat" although I just call it gross. I have tried all kinds of diets and plans, but have never been able to lose that weight around my middle. The older I get, the more awful it looks and the harder I know it is going to be to lose.

So when I saw this opportunity, I decided to take a look. The diet plan was developed by the editor of Prevention magazine. Basically, there is research that suggests that eating MUFAs (Monounsaturated Fatty Acids) at each meal targets belly fat, which is a major contributor to heart disease. Now, I certainly have enough problems without having to worry about heart disease as well.

So what are MUFAs? Oh my how about a handful of almonds? Some peanut butter? Avocado, yummy! Olives... finally, the best yet, dark chocolate.

So, I went to the site and they are looking for women to try this diet... for free! And I thought to myself, what have I got to lose, except this extra padding around the middle that I don't need. So I filled out the form and am just waiting to see if I qualify.

Keep your fingers crossed, maybe I will get picked and then I will share my progress with all of you!

2008-11-24T07:26:00.000-08:00

See these two crazy kids? They are Shae and Mattie. Shae is Ric's son. Mattie is now the official daughter-in-law. They eloped on Wednesday. Shae called to tell us on Sunday. I asked him why he didn't call sooner. Why they didn't tell us their plans, since we aren't even in the same state, it isn't like we could stop them (not that we would have!) He said he was afraid of what his dad would say. Actually, Ric was okay with it. We both met Mattie once and we loved her right away. I think they are a little young (21), but I know that they are both good kids (okay, I sound really old saying that)... but they are young. Shae has a good head on his shoulders and has really made a lot of great decisions about his life in the last year or so. Anyway, we have a new member of our family, and we couldn't be happier.

Besides, that, Mattie doesn't let Shae get away with picking on Chick too much... Notice, I didn't say "at all". He had a message for Chick when I talked to him yesterday. He said thank you for the pictures I sent of Chick, he wanted me to tell her he wanted to use them as kindling, but Mattie wouldn't let him, then she went out and bought frames for them so now he has to look at her pictures every day. Poor boy... he could be looking at a lot worse!

I told Chick, she was lucky she is older because she is much quicker witted than if she had been a little one, and she can send some of her own little zingers back at him. After all, she sees how my brother and I tease each other, so she gets to skip all the growing up with a brat of a brother, this way she just gets the benefits of an older brother. I think Shae likes having a little sister too...

I also did some Christmas shopping this weekend. I got a few little things for Chick, I got the nieces, nephews, and cousins. I put my little Christmon tree up (although it is only partially decorated with three ornaments, but it is up). I put up my nativity. I don't know if I will put up the bigger tree or not this year. It depends on my mood later in the month, that and since I have to put it up and take it down myself, how much work I really want to do.

2008-11-21T10:09:00.000-08:00

Oh, and one other thing.... you do know what today is, right?

Chick is with her dad this weekend. Tonight we have a Girl Scout meeting, she then goes to her dad's and I am going to a hockey game. I can't tell you how many times, when a new movie has come out that I want to see with her, that her dad ends up convincing her to go with him, even though we have made the plans. This time, I threatened her. I told her if she went with him, she would never get another thing to eat in my house, she would not get another stitch of clothing, she would be sent to live in the backyard, where even the dogs don't live.

I think the Cadettes (Girl Scouts) are going to make arrangements to see it together since they all want to see it and they have some money in their account. Thankfully, I am a leader, which means... I get to go too. If that falls through, next week sometime we are going to see this movie. Just the Chick and I.

2008-11-21T08:25:00.000-08:00

I feel bad.... I have not been keeping up with the blogging thing is so long. LIfe has a way of getting in the way. You know if it weren't for work, family , and all the other miscellaneous crap going on, I could just sit in front of my computer and enjoy myself with my blog and reading everyone else's.

Unfortunately, that pesky list up there, makes it near impossible to spend a little time doing anything else lately.

I am so looking forward to a long weekend next week. We are heading to my sister's house for Turkey Day. I think she said 20 people... I am just glad that I get to see and play with those wonderful nieces and nephew of mine!

If I don't get to post before then, have a great Turkey Day!

2008-11-21T07:45:00.000-08:00

Wow! I was looking for some forms for Chick for her Girl Scout Silver Award Project and ran across this video created by our council. Looking at all the girls, hearing the stories, seeing the smiles on these beautiful faces.... This is why I am a leader.

Girl Scouts "Experience the Movement" from Jamie Lee on Vimeo.

2008-11-18T13:59:00.000-08:00

Tink's procedure went well yesterday. At least that is the news I got with the quick phone call with my mom. No reflux, which is great. Now, to put some weight on the poor child...

Chick's face is looking better and better every day. She is healing very quickly on her face. Her knees, not so much.

I am working on some grant stuff at work and am getting very frustrated with the people who are supposed to be providing me with information. I am almost done with my part, just waiting on 4 small bits from people. The main portion has not been done yet. At least, as far as I know. We have to have it sent in on December 1, which means it has to be done next week. Granted it is not a huge document, but it is enough that I am worried that I will have to be working late before Thanksgiving.

I even took next Wednesday off work, hopefully I won't need to come in for any reason. Keep your fingers crossed!

Biggest Loser!

2008-11-17T09:28:00.000-08:00

I think I said something a few weeks ago about Atlanta's Biggest Loser. My friend Karen has been working hard for the past few weeks and has NEVER been in the bottom two. She is now one of the two women who are still in the "game". I am so proud of her. Her son (Brian in Iraq) is now in Kuwait, on his way to coming home! I am so thrilled for her. I am hoping that she wins this competition and that when Brian gets home, we will be able to get together when he and his sweetheart get married.

2008-11-17T08:05:00.000-08:00

Chick is healing well. The bruises are fading some, she is able to walk easier now... We were at the hockey game on Friday and ran into one of the players from last year (Bubba's favorite, TSM). He took one look at Chick and asked her what happened. (There were a bunch of other players sitting around as well). She told him that she was playing hockey at school and fell. They told her that she shouldn't have to take her gloves off at this young age! Then at church she was doing a little skit with Pastor David and some of the other kids in front of the church. Before they really got going, PD asked her what happened to her face, so she explained, which still didn't stop people from asking what happened. Even in the grocery store, the bagger asked her what happened. I think she is getting tired of telling people what happened.

Otherwise, the hockey games were sad... well, Friday night was an embarrassment, Saturday was a better game, but we lost in the shootout.

Say a little prayer for Tink today. She is going to get a test done for her bladder and kidneys and will need to be sedated. Gram went up to stay with Bubba and Princess.

Ric has taken a run to San Antonio. So far he is doing okay. He made sure he had a couple of days to make the trip, which worked out well since he gets tired easily. He even got to run across part of Texas with his son, Shawn (who is also a driver). Shawn says he has pictures of the kids to send to us, so I am looking forward to seeing Ric's grandkids. I can't say they are mine, because I am waaaayyyyy too young to have grandchildren. I am, after all, only 21. (It is my lie and I will tell it any way I want).

Shae and his girlfriend got an apartment together in El Paso. He is going to try to come down and pick up some furniture we have in the garage for their place. I am hoping that he can make it for Thanksgiving, but he won't know until the end of the week. Chick loves the fact that he is a big brother and picks on her. I think she just likes to tease him back. He called while we were in church on Sunday and I made a comment that I needed to call him back, but wanted to call Ric first. Chick made a comment about being mean to her brother because I was ignoring him. Then she said, it is so weird to say she had a brother.

Well, I best get back to the work at hand. The Boss is looking for some tables that I have not completed.

We are renaming her....

2008-11-13T17:07:00.000-08:00

Grace. The beautiful Chick has had a really bad day. It all started with PE class this morning. One of those nasty tennis nets on the court was down and the ever graceful Chick was not aware that it would jump up and trip her. These are the results...

Fortunately, or rather, unfortunately, you can't see all of the damage to her poor face. That bandaid covers a rather lovely scrape. Mostly just the top layer, but it is raw and oozy. This was taken in the doctor's office only a couple of hours after the incident. It looks much worse tonight. She doens't have a concussion, and but she does have a major headache. I need to keep an eye on her this evening to make sure she is still okay. The left knee also looks like hamburger, and the right knee has a small scrape.

One of the first things she said to me when I went to get her at my mom's house to take her to the doctor was that makeup wasn't going to be able to cover this mess. Yup, it sure isn't. She is still in pretty good spirits... well, this morning she was (now, not so much). Dr. C told me to let him know if she starts acting oddly or unusual in the next day or two. Chick just laughed and asked him if we should just let him know if she was acting more unusual than normal. So, at least, she was taking it well.

We will see how she does tomorrow. I told her I wasn't too worried about the homework tonight because she can work on it this weekend. With the headache, I just don't think that she would be able to do her best and she would just be grumpy.

Poor kid.

2008-11-12T08:49:00.000-08:00

I'm still around, just really busy at work. I am heading into my busiest time of year and probably won't get a break until February. I spend most of my days and plenty of nights in front of the computer working on grants and re-working what the Boss has changed, etc. It is really hard to even get time off for Christmas, even though we are closed for two weeks. I still end up coming into the office.

Ric's dad is doing well. He had a kidney stone (it passed) and pneumonia (he is better). Sue (Ric's mom) is still suffering from the effects of the chemo. She is getting anxious to get back to feeling better. She has three more weeks until her PET scan.

Chick is having a lot of work for school and add in Girl Scouts, and we are busy non-stop. Of course, hockey has started up and we can't miss that on Friday and Saturday nights.

You remember the Golden Girls? Well, this is how I will start my story for the day... Picture it, 3:00 am, off in dreamland and suddenly.... we are jerked out of our peaceful slumber to the sound of the smoke alarm blaring. Ric and I tore out of the bedroom, Chick meets us in the living room which is filled with smoke. It was fuzzy and hard to see. It smells like the pine we had been burning. We are frantic trying to get the alarm off, open the windows, check for a fire, get Chick out of the way and into the garage. No flames, Ric gets up in the crawl space, he is outside looking at the roof. I am feeling the walls over the fireplace. I have my hand in the fireplace. Nothing is hot. There is just huge amounts of smoke. The alarm stops because of the open windows. Chick heads back to bed. Ric heads out to check one more time and says, well we can go back to bed, there isn't anything.

Now, I am not stupid. The expression, "Where there is smoke, there is fire" isn't just for fun. No, there is a reason that this is a common saying. I told him if he felt comfortable enough to go back to bed, he could but there was no way in hell I would be able to sleep unless I knew exactly why we had smoke filling up our house. At this point, he is looking for Jena (the Jumper). Yup, you guessed, it. 3:00 in the morning and he has to go out looking for the stupid dog who jumped the fence. I was hearing something from the fireplace and I kept thinking, I put my hand in there, it wasn't hot. Turns out, the noise (and smoke) was from the ash can. I have a huge steel pot that Ric uses to deep fry turkeys and I use for cleaning out the fireplace. I had put in a piece of wood that hadn't burned the previous night into the can as well. Thankfully, I hadn't taken it out to dump. Unfortunately, I had left it in the house by the fireplace. I picked up that piece of burned wood with my hands. It wasn't hot. I am sure Wendy will tell me all the reasons why, but it had smoldered and sent enough smoke into the house to make the alarm go off at 3:00. I ended up putting it on the patio and I poured a bunch of water over it and stirred it up to make sure it cooled down. As I was stirring I could hear the hissing and see the embers in the soot. I guess I learned my lesson. Even after sitting for almost 24 hours, and looking and feeling completely cool, a piece of partially burned wood may not be cool.

We have been having fires in the evening because it isn't really cold enough at night to put the furnace on. I would rather sit comfy with a fire in the fireplace. We even leave the door open a bit so the dogs can go in and out and it is comfortable. Before starting the fire in the evenings, we clean the fireplace out. I am going to be much more vigilant in the future about this.

So I had gone to be at 10:30, got up at 1:00 because I couldn't sleep, went into the office to play around on the computer for an hour, went back to bed, walking through the house, not noticing smoke but still smelling that lovely fire smell. I thought nothing of it. I had just nodded off to sleep and then to be awoken so abruptly. I had a hard time falling back to sleep. So, by the time I went back to bed, it was about 4:00. I had to be up at 6:00. Needless to say, I am really tired today.

So, I wonder if I will feel up to having a fire tonight or will I just turn on the heater?

2008-11-03T19:09:00.001-08:00

We had some bad news this evening from Ric's sister. His dad is in the hospital. Ric is so discouraged. He wants to know how much more the family can take. It seems as if this year has not gotten any better health-wise for us. At this point, they believe that Doyle had a kidney stone. They believe that it has passed, but they ran a CT scan to make sure. They didn't find the stone, but he has pneumonia. We are hoping we can get more news tomorrow. Right now, Sue is staying in the hospital with Doyle and Karen (his sister) will be back at the hospital tomorrow. It is so hard for Ric to be 1200 miles away and not be able to do anything. We last saw his parents when Ric went in for his surgery. They have not seen him since so they don't know how much he has "aged". We haven't been able to get down to see Sue since her cancer treatments started. We haven't been able to see his niece since, well, a really long time. We really want to see her since she gave birth to the most beautiful little boy a couple of months ago. So, there have been some good things this year. Problem is, sometimes we forget and dwell on all those horrible things that have happened.

Pray for good news tomorrow.

Kori posted about Richard's doctor's appointment. It didn't go as they had hoped. They are reviewing their options and he will have another scan in December. Pray for my dear friend.

My brother leaves tomorrow to go back to Hawaii. We had a great time at dinner. I am going to miss him. Chick is going to miss him, but not as much as she is going to miss Rocky. That big old slobbery dog.

Tink is going in for some tests next week as a follow up to her surgery last year. She is still having some pretty severe infections. They are actually going to sedate her for the tests which is great. Not so much for Carolyn and Brent, I am sure, but at least it will be better for Tink. Hopefully we will know pretty quickly what the results are.

2008-11-03T12:57:00.000-08:00

Oh, and something else. I finally go to the dentist on Wednesday to get the "permanent" crown. Only two week after they told me it would actually be in. I guess since I am not really paying for it, then they can hold it hostage for a bit longer? Who knows... the temp they put in on October 17, didn't even last 24 hours. I'll even let you in on a secret, well not really, I never went back to have them replace the temp. I just didn't feel like having to go every other day to get it put back in. I sure hope that they use better adhesive for the permanent one. If not, I may not be a very nice person to whomever answers the phone the first time it falls out again. I will apologize in advance to Patty because even though she answers the phone and it isn't her fault the dentists can't get something right, she will be the first in my line of fire.

Not a game for a family function....

2008-11-03T12:33:00.000-08:00

While I am waiting for Kori to update us on Richard, for your viewing pleasure, I present a bunch of drunk southern gals having some fun....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pt9lErsLafw

LOL.... I am making a list of party games, this has to be one. Especially if the party involves a lot of drinking.

Thanks to my co-worker, Karen, who found this amusing and passed it on....

Ric went to the oncologist today and weighs 125.5 pounds (can't forget that extra .5). We are waiting for the blood work to come back, but so far everything looks good. He has an appointment with the radiation oncologist tomorrow that I will try to get to with him.

Tonight I am going out to eat with my brother for his last night here. He leaves at some ungodly hour at an airport almost two hours away, so I have to say good-bye to him now. I will also have to make sure to give my Rocky some extra hugs, cause he is just the sweetest.

Just look at that face... These are from awhile ago when I visited them in Virginia, and I don't have any current pictures on this computer. What a big old, slobby, love.

2008-11-02T00:33:00.000-07:00

We've had a fun weekend. Ric isn't doing too great. He is not gaining weight and I think he is still losing. He looks like a skeleton, perfect for this time of year, but not so great for his health. He is so tired. Today he was saying he had a sore throat and his tongue hurt. He goes in to the doctor on Monday so we will see what they say. He isn't running a fever or anything so I don't think it is a virus. We will have to wait and see.

Chick and her friends had a great time trick-or-treating. Chick was Alice in Wonderland. She looked really cute. M was a witch and S, well, she was some ballerina in a car accident or something. Chick wanted to be a dead ballerina as well and I put my foot down. I don't think we need to go for gross. We had 139 kids at our door. I counted. I didn't even have to give out my tricks for those people I mentioned in my last post. We didn't have anyone come who was not dressed up. No parents asked for candy. We did have a group of people come who didn't speak a lick of English. I asked a group of kids for a trick before they got their candy.... not one of them had anything to say. I asked for a joke instead and got some crazy joke that didn't make sense. I gave them candy anyway. I met a bunch at the door with one of the rats on my shoulder (I switched them out throughout the evening). They were a big hit. I had a couple of girls who looked really cute dressed as lifeguards who, as they walked away, said they felt like they were too old to be doing this. Hint.... If you think you are too old, you probably are.

I was a little irritated with M's parents. The girls were supposed to be walking around the neighborhood with one of them and I found out that they were out by themselves. There are hundred of people who were in the neighborhood and people drive in just to come out in our area. They ended up going to S's house for a sleepover and when I didn't hear from them by 10:00, I called over there to check in on Chick. Sorry, but if you say you are going to chaperone the kids, please make sure that you do it. Chick got an earful on the way home this morning about calling me. I need to give her a little freedom, but when she doesn't check in with me, I have a tendency to worry.

Chick was excited to see Uncle John and Gram at the house. The came in and raided our candy basket, grabbed a couple of Mountain Dews (apparently they needed more to keep them hyped up), and took off down the road. A few minutes later they came back yelling for Uncle John because he had given them only two regular Mountain Dews and a couple of red ones. They only wanted the real thing. This was of course just a way to pick on Uncle John. I told them if they didn't leave soon, they were going to have Uncle John as a chaperone. They took off real fast.

We went to the Celtic Festival today and had a great time. Chick walked in with the clans since her uncle is big on their family history. I took a bunch of pictures to send to her Uncle to post on the clan site. I was so hot out there today. When we left at 3:30 it was 93 degrees. But we did have a good time. Princess will eat anything, even the haggis my dad bought. My sister shuddered when she actually asked for seconds. Chick's other grandma was very happy to see that we brought Carolyn, Brent and the kids. She was especially happy to meet Princess. She has heard all about her from Chick. I picked up Chick's "Santa" gift but won't tell about it here since she occasionally gets online. I also got a scarf from my mom's families tartan for myself. We didn't get to watch a lot of the competitions because the kids were busy playing games and having too much of a good time to sit around, besides, there was no shade in the arena area. The next festival is in February so it should be a bit cooler.

Now for the pictures:

Chick in her costume

Chick, M and S

Chick and her grandma B.

Mumpie and his haggis.

Princess getting another bite of the haggis.

Tink showing off her tattoo like Uncle John's

Bubba sitting in a fairy circle.

2008-10-31T00:21:00.000-07:00

I've been hiding out the last few days. I am taking a short blogging break, but I will post some pictures this weekend of Halloween. Nothing is wrong per se, I am just feeling a bit of anxiety.

Ric's doctor's appointments are next week. I do foresee them doing any sort of tests, except maybe blood work to see if his protein levels are up. His weight is still hovering around 120. He has been eating a lot more, but his body just isn't getting what it needs to make him gain the weight. It also doesn't help that he still can't taste anything and his salivary glands are still not working.

Also, pray for Richard and Kori as Richard goes in to his doctor's appointment on Monday.

Chick had her annual exam this morning. She is now officially taller than Grandma and not afraid to let Gram know this. She still has about an inch to go for me and a little more than that for my sister. She also had her flu shot... no major dramatics for this one. We also discussed giving her the gardasil shot. Dr. C likes to do these series vaccinations in the spring because then the healthy kid doesn't have to go into the office with all the sick kids. We discussed this at great length and for various reasons have decided to have her begin these in April 2009 instead of April 2010. He normally would have waited with her since she isn't considered high risk, she is still pretty naive about some things so it made more sense to wait, but I had some concerns and he agreed to start her in April. Of course she hates that idea since these particular shots are pretty painful.

So while I am on my little break, I am spending time with my brother who leaves on Tuesday to go back to his family in Hawaii and is taking his dog... We are also going to be spending time with my sister's family when they come visit on Saturday and we are going to the Highland games. Tomorrow night I will be sitting by my door giving out candy, except to those who are either too young, waaay to old, or not dressed in a costume. I especially hate the ones where the parents come to the door with a bag for their "sick" kid at home, when both parents are there. I have special treats for them. It isn't that I have anything against kids who are sick and their parents were smart enough to leave them home, but when Chick comes home with at least 10 pounds of candy that we end up throwing away in six months, if there is indeed a sick kid at home, the one who is actually out can share his spoils.

Chick has an adorable costume and is heading out with her friends tomorrow night. I am glad I don't have to be the adult walking around with them this year. They plan to do our whole neighborhood and even have it mapped out. No thanks, I would rather listen to the doorbell and the dogs barking.

2008-10-28T13:17:00.000-07:00

I am not really into college basketball, but due to where I live and having a daughter who goes to school with Lute Olson's grandson, you know, this whole thing with having press conferences, etc. just cracks me up. I wish the man the best as he deals with his stroke. But the man should have retired before all this soap opera drama came into play. I mean really.

The man's wife of many, many years died of cancer. The man took maybe a week away from coaching because that is what "Bobbie" would have wanted. A couple of years later he marries a woman who was younger and never really "fit" in with the basketball group here.

Last year, when he just up and left the program and filed for divorce, there had to have been something else going on. Now, today, we find out he had a stroke sometime in the last year that effected his decision making skills. Ya think? I mean he is 74, not even one year out of his second marriage and is already engaged to a woman who is 47. Hello?

Whatever.

Chick says his grandson is a huge snob who thinks the world should revolve around him because "his grandfather is famous". Yes, that is a quote from this kid. Although she did say she was partners with him for a project recently and unlike some of the kids in her group, he actually did his part and didn't leave it all up to Chick.

Well, now that the basketball program has been thrown for a loop with many new recruits leaving because of the lies the man told, maybe we won't hear quite so much about how Lute Olson should be renamed "God".

2008-10-27T15:46:00.000-07:00

I was looking for a picture of Chick hiding her face. Only because I thoroughly embarrassed her last night. Shouldn't she know by now that nothing is sacred? Okay, some things are, and I have kept one of her "secrets" for quite some time, so I won't tell you that she no longer has a crush on.... oops, sorry. I have to keep that to myself.

Last night she came home from her dad's and informed me that she had started. My first thought was, finally! After all she is 13, most of the girls in our GS troop started a long time ago and she is one of the older ones. Anyway, I took her to Walgreens to pick up some more "supplies" and we ran into one of my good friends. Of course, we were in the aisle with said supplies and I opened my mouth and told Gina that Chick had finally started. You know how the face gets red, she wanted to sink into the floor. Yes, I am a good mom like that. I figure, if I am not embarrassing you, I am not doing my job.

Of course, I then called my mom and my sister to let them know. Oh, and Ric. I figure he needs fair warning so he stays far away, you know, those mood swings can be a real pain.

I asked her if she was prepared at her dad's since I had tried to make sure she was a loooooong time ago (thankfully she was). Of course, I told her, she could always tell her dad and he could run to the store for her. He did after all, have six older sisters. I think she was more embarrassed about telling him than me tell Gina in the middle of a store.

Poor kid... I wonder what she would do if she knew I blogged about this milestone?

Pictures from Philadelphia

2008-10-24T22:57:00.000-07:00

The Liberty Bell. Did you know there is a misspelling on the bell? Yup, they spelled Pennsylvania wrong. It is missing one of the n's.

Constitution Hall... This was a lot of fun. They had a whole section dedicated to the elections.

Christ Church Cemetary. Most of the headstones were very hard to read and some were just mere stumps. This is still a working cemetary with graves from the late 1990s and early 2000s.

Benjamin and Deborah Franklin's gravesite.

The famous Love statue. Yup, the water is pink. You could see it for a couple of blocks away, the water was so high. Come to find out, there is a smaller version on the university campus. We didn't really have to find our way around downtown and find a place to park to get a picture. You can't really tell in this picture unless you blow it up, but I am wearing sandals. It was freezing. After all the walking, my feet were killing me in my boots, so I changed over to these. I am glad I did, but my poor cold toes....

But then we would have missed this... The courtyard in front of this building was full of various game pieces... dominos, bingo numbers, monopoly pieces, chess pieces. It was a blast.

Just for Bubba... Meet Rexie... He is an actual copy of the one in the Museum in New York.

Just a little late...

2008-10-22T21:01:00.000-07:00

Happy birthday, Chick-a-dee! Chick turned 13 on Monday and of course being in Philadelphia with no access to my pictures, I couldn't post any of her. So here they are...

I just want to know where all those years went. I look at pictures of when she was little and see a huge change from 5 to 6 and then again from 10 to 11. But especially this year from 12 to 13 there is a big difference in her appearance.

2008-10-22T11:35:00.000-07:00

We are home! It was so cold in Philadelphia... well, those in who live in Philadelphia will say it was pretty nice for this time of year. We however, we cold. The meeting I went for was good. Chick and my mom had a great time. Right now I am just trying to get laundry done, the house cleaned up, and Chick getting to her homework that she missed. I will post more later with pictures.

And the tooth that I had "fixed" on Thursday afternoon before heading to my meeting? Yeah, it lasted less than 24 hours. I haven't even bothered to call them to have them do a replacement yet. After all, I just got back into town today. I get the permanent crown on Tuesday so hopefully that one will last. This is getting crazy.

2008-10-16T09:57:00.000-07:00

I signed up, did you? Make sure you tell her I sent you!

2008-10-16T09:24:00.000-07:00

Wendy, from the Firehouse Journal (link on the right) had a great idea about interviewing her readers. Her questions to me were...

Hi Susie- How has Ric's cancer changed your outlook on life? How has it impacted your family? What advice would you give to another family who has just learned of the diagnosis?

What a great group of questions!

First off, instead of taking every day for granted, I am looking for more and more things to be thankful for. I am thankful that my job keeps me busy. I am thankful that Chick drives us crazy all the time. Things that didn't mean much to me before mean so much more now. Even Chick giving us a hard time because she is alive, we are alive to have to deal with those unpleasant moments. Every day is a gift. Sometimes every moment is a gift. When he was diagnosed, it was a complete shock. We were not prepared for something like that. The speed that they put him into surgery and got him into the treatment was a whirlwind. Who would have thought that a little swollen gland could be so much more?

I pray a lot more. I completely believe that without the prayers of friends and family, the outcome would not have been so good for him. When someone else is hurting, I pray for them. My little prayer goes straight to God and I know he listens. I know he hears. Will he answer like I want him to? Maybe, maybe not, but when he answers, it what he has planned out for us. Will Ric's cancer come back? I hope not, but if it does, I will be forever grateful for the prayers and love from my family and friends. And we will start all over again.

How has it impacted my family... Oh, the stories I could tell. There have been more arguments and more hurt feelings in my house over the past nine months. Some of this I contribute to the treatments and the fear we all have felt. Chick has been acting out a lot more. Part of that is because Ric has not been able to work, so we are struggling financially. It has been a humbling experience. We are one small tragedy away from being homeless. Even with insurance, we still had a lot of medical bills to cover. We have had to survive on 2/3 less income than we were used to. But, we have each other. We are making it. We are going to slowly work our way back into the black and we will probably conveniently forget what it was like these past few months. Oh, how I hope we don't! As Ric feels better, he has gone from being grouchy and moody, back to his old self again. It has been a slow process, and he is still not there yet, but I can see glimpses of the man I fell in love with. I have had to learn to be more patient with him and Chick. I have had to decide "is it worth it?" Does getting into an argument over something insignificant really make the day better? I am not saying I haven't started an argument over something stupid, but I have caught myself a number of times and THAT is what has made the day better.

My parents are here in town with me and they have really helped us. It has made them much closer to Ric than I ever thought would happen. My aunt has been wonderful for Ric to talk to since she has gone through this with my uncle. It has really brought him and his kids closer together when for so many years, they didn't understand him (a whole other issue that is not for me to tell). The love that we have experienced with our families has been wonderful. The hurt in our immediate family has shown that we need to be strong together and that we can do it.

Advice for others... Cancer is not the end of the world. I hate saying that knowing that I have friends who are in the process of dying of cancer, knowing that it is the end for them. But there is still hope. There has to be hope and positive outlooks when you first start the journey. I remember asking Dr. M about Ric's chances when we first went to see him. I was expecting numbers... 50%, 70%... What I got was, the prognosis is excellent, he will beat this... He told us that being positive is one of the key factors in beating the cancer. Easier said than done, I know there were times when I had doubts and those fears reared their ugly heads.

Finding support is a number one priority. Not just within your family. I have my parents, my sister and brother, his parents, his sisters, the kids, other family members. They were all praying and calling and supporting us. I also had my friends and his friends. There were times when he couldn't talk because of the treatment. I had to talk to people I didn't even know well (friends of his). They were the most supportive and loving people and I consider them my friends now. Support from the church. Prayers. Support from strangers (blogging friends) who I now consider dear friends. Counseling, if needed. We needed. Support groups. Those are the greatest things. Find a support group of people who are going through the same type of cancer you are. It can be depressing, but it can be uplifting.

Don't forget to talk to each other. Make sure you know what the other person wants. When the going gets tough and they have to stop treatment for a while or permanently, be supportive. Be on the same page. The ultimate decision is with the patient, but they do take into consideration what the other person is feeling as well. I know. It is hard. But don't ever stop talking.

Make sure you say I love you often. Ric got so tired of me saying it! I never got tired of him saying it. It became a joke, make us laugh. Laughter is one of the best mood lifters around. A touch says I love you just as easily as words.

Chemo changes everything. Parts no longer work the way the are supposed to. Hair falls out. Images change. The person you love is still there, just hiding behind that chemo. One of the hardest things he had to deal with was his image. I didn't have such a hard time, he had a real hard time, he wasn't the strong man he knew before. When he looked in the mirror he was old, worn, thin. He aged significantly in the months of treatment. But I knew he was still there. Even now, when he still looks old and thin, I know he is still there. It will take time. More time than the treatments. He will get back to being strong again. He may never look the same and part of that was the surgery, but he is still there.

One of the hardest things for me was the lack of intimacy. He didn't like the way he looked, he was so tired and worn, he forgot that I needed hugs from time to time. Sitting on the couch, I could no longer curl up next to him if I was cold, because he was colder. He was so thin, there wasn't anything to cushion me. His bones were poking me. It was uncomfortable for him, it was uncomfortable for me. He stopped holding my hand. He stopped giving me kisses (that was partially because of the radiation as well). It was so hard for me. It was hard for him. Patience is not one of my strong suits. Crawling into bed, I used to snuggle with him to get warm. Now he was snuggling to me to get warm. The feel of his legs, his arms, was completely different with no fat.

Patience, love, hope, prayer, support. Not necessarily in that order, and sometimes it has to be mixed up into another order.

So those are my answers, long-winded and all.

2008-10-16T09:06:00.000-07:00

So, does the tooth fairy come to adults who have lost their stupid crown for the 100th time? Okay, it just seems like it is the 100th time, but last night, eating pizza of all things, the stupid thing came out again. Thankfully I didn't swallow it like I did the gold crown and this one is just a temp, but come on.... I haven't even had it in for a week and it is falling out?! All day yesterday it felt odd. It didn't seem loose so I didn't worry too much about it. Then I make pizza for me and Chick and the first bite, the very first bite, it comes out. Thankfully I didn't chew on it either. Unfortunately, I couldn't get it back in comfortably without choking myself so I just left it out. I called this morning and have an appointment this afternoon to get it cemented back into place.

Right now the area where they did the removing of the gum, it is tender and sore. I think the temporary was kind of protecting the area. It is so sore today and just uncomfortable. They initially wanted me to come in tomorrow to get it done, but I am leaving for a meeting in Philadelphia tomorrow. Chick and my mom are going with me since Chick's birthday is Monday. Our flight leaves at the ungodly hour of 5:30 am which means we have to get up around 3:00 am in order to get ready and get to the airport.

I was not going to bring my computer on the trip, but unfortunately, Chick will have homework and schoolwork that she is missing. Thankfully, the teachers normally (or are supposed to) put the assignments online so she can check each evening and do her work while we are on the trip.

Since I am taking the time off tomorrow, my boss isn't too happy because of the short day today. So I will be working like crazy until I leave the office around 1:30.

While I am gone, I may not post too much since I am hoping that I will be having a great time with my mom and Chick.

Looking for love?

2008-10-16T09:03:00.000-07:00

True.com is an online dating site that goes beyond personal ads. They have a coaching center to help you create an expert profile. You can learn how to make the most of your profile. Do’s and don’ts of pictures online. You can read weekly advice from a profile coach and daily tips.
There is a section for tips and advice. For instance, are you a single parent who is looking for someone? There is a section for single parents. With Halloween coming up, you can see what your costume says about your personality. Did you know if you dress as an “innocent” (princess or fairy) you long for a return to a safer and simpler time? How about if you dress as something or someone scary (i.e. Dracula) you are gaining a sense of control over your fears.
How about great fall date ideas like going to the local fall festival or carving a pumpkin with your sweetie? A date night for the senses? There are ideas and menus so everything is planned out for you already.
True.com has a free compatibility test to help you learn more about yourself and your ideal partner. It explains how your traits, attitudes, and abilities influence your connections with others.
While I am not looking for love (I have found my soul mate), the ideas are endless on this site. But if you are looking you can search for free.
Signing up is free and easy too!

2008-10-15T09:09:00.001-07:00

Two of my friends have sent this email to me today.... I thought instead of sending it to my buddies in my address book, I would also post it on my blog. Please feel free to share it with your friends!

Hello, Pretty Lady!

You have been hit.
You have been considered one of the 10 prettiest ladies with a kind, warm and loving heart. Once you have been hit, you have to hit 10 pretty ladies with kind, warm and loving hearts. If you get hit again you know you're really pretty and kind. So hit 10 pretty ladies to let them know they are pretty -- both on the inside and the outside - and that they are loved and cared for.

SEND THIS TO PRETTY LADIES, TO BRIGHTEN THEIR DAY, INCLUDING THE ONE WHO SENT IT TO YOU! REMIND LADIES TO BE INFORMED, AWARE AND BE CHECKED FOR THEIR HEALTH'S SAKE. TELL THEM THAT NO ONE WANTS TO LOSE THEM - AFTER ALL, THEY ARE PRETTY LADIES WITH KIND, WARM LOVING HEARTS..

All you are asked to do is keep this circulating (even if to one person).

In memory of anyone you know that has been struck by cancer

2008-10-15T08:03:00.000-07:00

There was an article this morning on the abc news site. The link is here. It links oral sex to throat cancer. From what I am reading, it sounds as if the cancer begins in the tonsil. Hmmm, just where Ric's started. His cousin's was the same way. Reading the comments with the article, it sounds as if this is an ongoing issue and treatment may have to continue for years. I have no idea if this is what is going to have to happen with Ric. We don't know how his cancer began. We don't know if it was linked to HPV. But it is an interesting story and something that our children should be talked to about. I know I will talk to Chick when she is older.

She will also be getting the vaccination when she goes to the doctor. Last year Dr. C told me she didn't need it right now because she is not like many of the other young female patients he sees. I have talked to her about changes in her body and have talked to her a bit about sex. She knows that she can come to me with anything and there are times when I bring it up, just to gauge her reactions. Now, I am not totally naive in thinking that she doesn't hide things from me, because I am sure she does, but I try to keep an open line of communication with her.

I would absolutely hate to have her go through something like this in the future. I want to make sure that she is aware of the risks. I will definitely be printing this article out and sharing it with her.

Yes, even though she is still very young maturity wise compared to a lot of other pre-teens out there, I want to make sure that she is protected as much as possible.

2008-10-10T12:37:00.000-07:00

So, I have an hour or so before I have to leave work to go have my teeth worked on. I am pretty nervous. I really hate the dentist and from what I understand, this procedure is not going to be very pleasant. Besides that, I have a really horrible gag reflex. There are times when food bothers me. I was hoping to borrow Chick's ipod, but I forgot to remind her to charge it yesterday. So when I went in to get it this morning, it wasn't sitting on the charger and it was dead. So I have to listen to the whatever they are going to do to me and their crappy music. Oh, wish me luck. Hopefully I will feel up to doing anything this weekend. I have to do some house cleaning and we are planning on going to a local event tomorrow. If not, I guess, my house will remain dirty.

Family trees

2008-10-10T12:27:00.000-07:00

Sine my parents have recently returned from Scotland a few weeks ago, Chick has been asking about our family tree. Many years ago, when I had the time, my sister, my aunt, my mom, and myself had been working on it. It is very hard to gather information in other countries. It doesn't take much for us to get into that problem with my family. One of the best sources of information, we have found are
death certificates. This has helped us go back one more generation with names and information of occupations. Information from the United Kingdom is pretty easy to find... well to some extent. Other European countries (Hungary and Germany, in my case) are not exactly the easiest places to gather information. My dad does have a cousin in Germany who sent us a lot of information on his family that was helpful.

I want to be able to give Chick a really good family history (at least from me). I love to look at the old census records and ship manifests. Seeing my family members' names and their ages is really a neat thing. But death certificate give you that one more step back. They list names of parents and where they were born and sometimes their occupations.

2008-10-08T13:21:00.000-07:00

Way back I posted about Grammie Joyce. You can go here to see the post.

I found out at lunch today that Grammie is in a coma. A couple of months ago she fell and broke her hip. She was doing so well with the rehab. She ended up getting an intestinal infection and she had a stroke. She is now in the coma.

I was talking to her daughter at the hospice a little while ago. Grammie is ready to go. She has made peace with everything and she was very peaceful while I was there visiting. I held her hand and talked to her. I told her about Ric being cancer free since I wasn't sure if she had heard that yet or not. I told her how beautiful Princess is. I told her how much Chick missed her at church. I told her that I had a picture of Chick from last weekend that has her name on it and I had intended on sending it to her in rehab to give her a little boost. I told her how much I appreciated her taking on Chick as her "granddaughter" over the past 13 years.

I was thinking on my way back to the office of the little things that Grammie has done for Chick. Chick was baptized on Christmas Eve day. She wore the same gown that my sister and I wore (well, there used to be two of them, but Chick only wore one ). Grammie asked if I would wrap Chick in a blanket that she had. It was a beautiful soft, white knit blanket that looked so beautiful with the gown. I was happy to have her cuddled in such a beautiful bit of love. That same day she gave me a gorgeous Wedgewood ornament for our Christmas tree for Chick. Every year when I take it out of it's box I tell Chick about that Christmas Eve.

In the last couple of years, Grammie has known she wasn't going to be around much longer. She had some beautiful pieces of Indian jewelry that her daughter's didn't want. She has handed them out to some of us. She gave me a gorgeous set of pieces with green stones. I don't wear them often because they are large, but when I do wear them, I always think of her when I put them on. Recently, she gave Chick a piece. Chick asked why she was getting it and said it really wasn't her style. And she was right. It isn't what a 12-13 year old would wear, but in a few years, when I take it out of my box and put it in hers, she is going to remember Grammie. She may never wear it. That is okay. It is a piece of Grammie's heart.

Laurie (Grammie's daughter) told me she was ready to go. She had prepared for this. She had a good life, a long life, longer than expected. It is just so hard because even though she was ready to go, we aren't ready for her to go. Who is going to give the kids candy at church? Reminding them at the same time to take only two and to ask mom and dad if they can have it? Who is going to give rides on her scooter? How about the little ones who haven't graduated to being able to drive the scooter by themselves? Who is going to give a great big hug and ask how we are doing? Who is going to take over with the constant hiss of an oxygen tank during the quiet moments in church, reminding us of God's plans?

I was thinking about that last statement and I remember when Ric sang his song at church (The Great I Am, on YouTube). I moved forward and sat with Grammie to record him and she kept patting me on the knee. She was so pleased to see that he was feeling well enough to sing for us. You can hear her oxygen in the background. Every time I view that song, I am going to be listening to hear her. Knowing that she is still here, in our hearts. Knowing that she is with Grandpa Frank and finally doesn't need that scooter or oxygen tank.

Laurie told me today after Grandpa Frank died, Grammie was sad. Not surprisingly. She decided to move to San Antonio to be closer to her family. She was not happy there. Laurie said she realized that she had a great support system here. She moved back and Laurie said Grammie told her that these last few years have been the happiest she has ever been.

I am so glad that we have made her last years on earth happy, because she has done the same for us. I've been missing her in church the past few weeks and I know she hadn't felt up to company in the hospital. I only wish I hadn't listened and gone to visit her when she was doing so well. It didn't stop me from praying for her, praying for healing to her hip. If I had only known the next time I would see her would be in a hospital bed, in a coma.

Pray for her to make her way to Heaven with peace.

A better day today?

2008-10-08T08:42:00.000-07:00

Well, I don't know. I do feel much better today. I increased my medication dosage a bit. Of course it will take a few days for it to actually help me, but it may be the placebo effect. I am going to give it a couple of weeks and see how I feel before I panic and get my prescription changed. In the meantime, I am trying to be very aware of how my mind is functioning right now. Yesterday I wasn't feeling depressed, but feeling like I could cry at the drop of a hat. The day wasn't bad, just overwhelming for some reason. Today I am feeling more steady and ready to go on with the day. Hopefully it will remain that way as the day progresses.

The other odd thing about yesterday was how the time seemed to really be slow. I was busy at work. I got a lot accomplished, but it seemed like the clock was moving so slowly. Normally the time flies by when I am as busy as I was yesterday.

Chick is hanging in there with me. I told her right off when I picked her up that I was not feeling great and she should try to respect that I was moody and might be snappy toward her. She was great last night. Maybe I should tell her that every day?! I guess she really did sense that I wasn't in a great mood. As soon as I got home I took my medication to get a head start on bedtime and I could actually concentrate on my book for a little while.

Chick was telling me about her day at school while we were driving home. It seems that one of the Spanish teachers (not hers, thankfully) is not exactly following the curriculum. Her friend has this teacher and so far they have learned to say "I like to drink beer" or some other nonsense. I know her friend's parents are going to lodge a complaint. Yes, this is something we want to teach our 8th graders. What ever happened to "I like tennis?"

She was also telling me about her Lit teacher, who I like very much. At the beginning of the year Chick sat in a group of two boys, another girl, and herself. Mrs. B calls the kids "sheep". The sheep are not allowed to socialize in the meadow (talk at their tables). If the sheep socialize they have to go to the barn (sit at the back of the classroom by themselves). If the offense is great, they go to slaughter (sit at the front of the classroom by Mrs. B's desk). Apparently, boy 1 is in the barn. Boy 2 has been sent to the slaughterhouse. A new boy, Boy 3, joined the meadow. It wasn't long before he was sent to the slaughterhouse. So now, Chick and Girl 1, are the only two in their meadow. This surprises me. Chick has always been a social butterfly (errr, sheep) and is actually controlling those sheep urges. I am proud of her.

Mrs. B is a very good teacher and has different ways to get the kids (or should I call them the sheep?) involved. Last week they played a game called Last Character Standing or something like that. They were given identities of characters from the book they are reading. Chick was given a Mrs. Somebody or other and another boy was given Main Character. Apparently, Main Character didn't want to be Main Character. Chick said she was watching some of the other kids and looked back down and Main Character had switched identities so he was now Mrs. Somebody and she was Main Character. He had also left her a $5 bill. She told him if he wanted to switch all he had to do was ask, not be sneaky and not try to bribe her. She gave him the money back and switched with him. Unfortunately for him, Mrs. B saw it and made him come up to be Mrs. Somebody in their game (totally not what he wanted). I was very proud of Chick for giving him the money back and being kid enough to agree to help him out. Too bad he wasn't really prepared for the game.

2008-10-07T13:09:00.000-07:00

I am feeling pretty down today. i have noticed over the past couple of days my medication has not been working as effectively as it has in the past to keep me from feeling too depressed. This is not good. The doctor has said I can increase the dosage so I will do that, but if it doesn't get better in the next couple of weeks, I am going to ask that he change the prescription so I can get back to feeling more "normal".

I had to leave work today, just to get out of the office for a bit. It seems like everything is overwhelming me today. Instead of going to get my lunch and come back to the office, I ended up skipping lunch and just driving around. Not the best thing to do with the gas prices so high, but I needed to be by myself. I needed to just go aimlessly wherever the road took me. I am not sure that it helped a whole lot. It just gave me more time to try to think of what is wrong. Of course, nothing came to mind.

I feel like I am on the verge of crying all day. The day seems to be going so slowly. It seems like an hour ago I checked the clock and it has only moved 15 minutes.

I know when I get home tonight I am going to be moody with Chick. I can tell myself this is going to happen. I can tell myself that since I know it is going to happen, I should be able to control it. I know that is not the case. Little things have set me off today and I know little things will set me off tonight. Last night was the same way. I knew I wasn't feeling right. I knew I should try to control my emotions so I wasn't snapping at her. It didn't work. I still snapped. It wasn't horrible, but it was not being a good mom.

I asked her to go to bed at 9:00 and she went, without trying for a few more minutes. She knew I was in this funk and she wanted to get away. Okay, maybe not get away, but she was aware of what was going on and knew it would be best if she just went to bed.

I tried reading, I couldn't concentrate. I tried watching television, I couldn't concentrate. I tried surfing the net... I couldn't concentrate. I feel like I am floundering and I know I don't want to be.

So, I will bump my dosage up a little (it really is just a little) and see if that helps. I have been taking the medication for so long that maybe it needs to be adjusted. Maybe my body is getting used to the dosage that has maintained me for so long. I did increase it a bit when Ric was first diagnosed (of course with the blessing of Dr. C) but was able to bring it back down after a few months to my "normal" level. Now, a few months later, I feel like I really need to increase it and there isn't anything that should be effecting me emotionally right now.

Is this a delayed reaction to the news that Ric's cancer is not showing up on the pet scan? Or is there more to this than I can comprehend?

Just call me.....

2008-10-05T18:54:00.001-07:00

Sucker.... In big bold letters...

Chick and I went to the pet store to get rattie food and shavings for the cages so we could clean them out. Unfortunately, instead of going to the normal store where I know the rodents are all male, we went to one that I had no idea all their rodents were female. We came home with this...

Meet Sugar. She is a little thing. I am guessing she is only about three or four months old. She is really small, compared to Cinnamon.

Her eyes aren't really red, I think it was just the flash on the camera. It is hard to tell the sizes in this picture, but Cinnamon is about twice her size. She is pretty skittish right now. I am guessing she wasn't held much as a real small baby. Probably not unusual with rats that are destined for pet stores. However, we held her and let her run around for a bit on the floor and she is much calmer now. So far she and Cinnamon are getting a long pretty well. I think it will take a few days for them to really become close buddies like Cinnamon and Nutmeg were, but it won't be too long.

So just call me Sucker....

2008-10-04T18:47:00.001-07:00

My two favorite pictures of Chick we had taken today for her birthday pictures....

I had never been to this photography place before. He ended up taking 50 pictures. We got to view all of them before picking the ones that we wanted. We picked up a couple of other poses, but these were my favorites.

2008-10-02T22:43:00.001-07:00

Our Nutmeg passed away today. We were not home all day (me at work, Chick at school). I came home to let the dogs out then went back to my parent's house for the evening. We got home around 9:00. I saw Nutty in the bottom of the cage but didn't think anything of it. Chick went to be at 9:30 and looked in at the ratties before bed. She called to me, I went to her, she was sobbing, Nutty was dead. :( Almost 10:00 at night and we are outside digging a hole in the hard desert ground to bury her. I was just going to dump her in the trash since it gets picked up tomorrow. Chick-a-dee wouldn't hear of it.

Now Cinnamon is frantically searching the cage for her sister. Chick is sobbing in my bed. I am exhausted and sad. She is going to try to get me to get another female rattie. I know it. I think we will wait a while. I know Cinny isn't going to like living alone even though her cage is right next to the boys.

The day we got the ratties. Chick holding Nutty.

Pretty little Nutty.

2008-10-02T12:56:00.000-07:00

The Psycho was given her letter yesterday afternoon telling her that her position was not going to be funded past October 31. Not surprisingly, she was upset. She knew this was coming, just not as soon as it did. She thought she was going to have a position until the end of the year. Some issues came to light earlier in the week that indicated this needed to be taken care of sooner, rather than later. More information came out after The Boss had left for the airport. This prompted me to talk to our Department Head (who is also The Boss's spouse). He was not happy with the information I provided. In fact, he was so upset that he actually left work early to go talk to his daughters.

This morning my co-workers and I decided that we needed to get her out today. I cornered The Head when he came in and told him what we would like to see done. (Ric didn't want me to come in to work this morning, that's how freaked he was and he doesn't freak about things easily). Anyway, he asked if I would go to Human Resources and see what our plan of action should be. It ended up the person I talked to and his supervisor came over and talked to about 8 of us for a couple of hours this morning. Police have been called, the forensic psychologist has been consulted. We have a plan that will take effect this afternoon. Hopefully, with what we have lined up, she will agree to what we are asking and be gone after today.

It may not work out like we would like, however, we do have back up plans and alternatives lined up. I will not have to be a part of the discussions with her and neither will The Boss (she is out of town until tomorrow anyway). Thankfully, we have a very good support here. There is always the possibility of danger, but if we play our cards right, we are hoping to eliminate it quickly.

I feel very comfortable with how they are handling the situation. I know that the Head feels more comfortable about his family as well. Now, I have to get a hold of The Boss and let her know what we are doing. I felt very comfortable taking the decision out of her hands at this point. The nerves in the office were frayed this morning and the tension was running high, wondering what was going to happen next. We are much more comfortable with the way things will be handled.

So no worries here.

We have begun our 3rd annual virtual Halloween party at work. Chick and I went and picked up some masks yesterday that will be used to take the pictures of everyone. Once I print them out, they will be posted on the wall and after Halloween we put them into a book for future enjoyment (read: we laugh hysterically at some of the pictures).

Here are a couple from 2006:

We had two different hats: The witch and the devil's horns, plus a variety of masks for everyone to put on. You can see in the background a few of the pictures that we had already posted. As well as my cute little beanie babies.

This is The Boss and a co-worker. He is shrinking down since he is tall. You will notice in the back of this picture the M&M collection. We have six of those dispensers (each one different) and they each hold a different type of M&M. They keep us happy. That slot machine one is great because it is so loud and people freak out when they go to get candy. Of course we don't always tell them when it is empty so then they feel really foolish... Ahhh, the joys of tormenting people.

Here are a few from 2007:

Notice the whole wall in the back filled with pictures. Last year we had masks with feathers and sequins. These were a big hit!

One of my favorite co-workers. He needed us to get his best side.

We even got the delivery people involved! They are real sports.

You will have to wait until Halloween to see some of the newest pictures....

Biggest Losers

2008-10-01T10:38:00.000-07:00

You've all heard of the Biggest Loser, right... well, a friend of mine is doing the Biggest Loser - Atlanta. She was the top loser this week. (Okay, that sounds bad, but it is true). I am so proud of her! If you want to check it out, the link is here. You can also vote for one of two people to stay on for the next weigh in. Karen (my friend) told me to vote to keep Cheryl on, so if you go to the site and feel like voting...

I just got the funniest phone call at work. In fact, I almost scrapped the whole Biggest Loser thing, but hey, I am rooting for my buddy to win! Anyway, I answered the phone and some guy, sounding a little tired at almost 11:00 in the morning, says "I need some information. I am going in front of a judge today and doing a breath test and I need to know how long alcohol stays in your system." Now, that isn't the type of thing we do here, but I was trying to be helpful, all the while trying not to just come out and say to him "Dude, you are screwed." I mean really? You know you are going in front of a judge, getting a breathalyzer and you are drinking?

We get a lot of these types of phone calls. Okay, I get a lot of these types of phone calls and email, etc. Normally I can send them off to someone else. Most of the information that comes through me is related to environmental toxicants: arsenic, mold, TCE. Sometimes we get the drug calls. Some guy, quite a while ago, wanted someone to test his urine sample for drugs. His frozen urine sample. Apparently he was doing some type of "research" to see if he could eliminate the drugs in his system by various means. Yeah, no, we don't do that. The easiest way to make sure there are no drugs in your system? Stop doing the drugs, you idiot.

2008-10-01T07:57:00.000-07:00

I just found out that the psycho person in our department is going to be getting her letter today giving her 30 days. The Boss is going to be out of town (which is good). We are waiting for the big guy to sign the letter and get it to her. The Boss asked me to subtly tell the staff in the office. I don't think she will get the letter until later this afternoon. I am glad that The Boss gave me a heads up because I know that psycho's anger is going to be directed to her and possibly toward me. I am not too concerned because there are people around me all day long.

We have come to the conclusion that she will probably not try anything today. From what I gather, she has been expecting this, probably not this soon, but she has known she would be out of a job at the end of the year. There were just some things that happened yesterday that pushed the time up.

I told the few co-workers that are in the office early (me and three others) so that they would be prepared and I told them I would let them know what the deal is once I find out. Three of us are very calm about what is going on. One is freaking out. I asked her if she knew what subtle was and that we need to keep this quiet right now. I just told her so that she would be prepared. She wants to lock the doors, call security, etc. Maybe once the letter gets handed to her we can do that, but yeah, doing it now would just tip her off. The anger psycho feels is not going to be directed toward this person so she has nothing to worry about. She is in an office that has walls and a door. Whereas the rest of us are in little cubicles. We aren't too concerned right now, I don't think she needs to be.

My Chick is home sick today. She came home from school early on Monday with tummy trouble. She felt good Tuesday morning and went to school. She called after being at school for an hour and went home. She was running a fever and had an upset tummy. Last night she was all worked up. She knew she wasn't feeling well enough to go to school today and of course she was still running a fever so she couldn't go to school. She has a math test and a fitness test today and she was going to miss them and she would have to go to Friday School. The middle school gets half days on Fridays for the teachers to do prep work and meetings and stuff (it cuts down on teacher in-service days). If she misses a test she has to do it on Friday afternoon. I think she will live.

2008-09-30T19:48:00.001-07:00

Last but not least, I have decided to give the kids nicknames on the blog instead of going by their initials.

K will now be called Chick. I have called her this since she was a tiny thing. There is more to that story, but I will leave it for now.

J - my brother's son - will now be called LJ - because we normally call him something similar anyway.

J - my brother's daughter - will now be called Mary as in Mary, Mary Quite Contrary. Besides that, my dad calls her that anyway.

B - my sister's son - will now be called Bubba because that is what I call him. My boy... I love him.

H - will be called Tink. That's her favorite.

S - we will call her Princess (Chick's idea).

2008-09-30T19:34:00.000-07:00

A couple more for kicks...

Cory and Stephen bought H and S matching dresses for their birthday and baptism, respectively. They were so adorable. The smallest Cory could find is a little large on S, but it is cute, nonetheless. K put it on over her other dress so the poor girl was just a tad overdressed, but she sure looked cute.

H blowing out her candle. This was taken just after she had her head buried in Carolyn's shoulder. Poor girl hates to be the center of attention. Notice, K in the background still "pool-ready" although she is playing B's Gameboy thing. Normally she doesn't pick them up. She has one (an older one) and tons of games, but it sits in the closet most of the time. B brings his over and has some silly game like Star Wars Lego something and she picks it up.

Obviously H likes pink and purple. What little girl doesn't. She is wearing one of her "fancy dress up" dresses. Yup, she is all girl and another one that is cute as a button.

We had to all stand around blocking the air conditioner so the candle wouldn't blow out before she got a chance. Well, we had already lit it a few times before we had Michael (Brent's cousin-in-law) stand at the end of the table. He is really tall and could block it a bit.

Finally, a picture of Flippy and Yum-Yum. Before they were born we called them "The Princes" when they learned how to talk, they couldn't say each other's names so these were the names they called each other... it was as close as they could get. Anyway, they are now 9 years old. For some reason because they are twins, people can't seem to tell them apart. Okay, that person would be K. I have no idea why she can't tell them apart because they totally don't look alike, but Flippy is on the left in this picture.

2008-09-30T19:23:00.001-07:00

I was going through my camera to get the pictures sorted and off onto the computer. I found these from H's birthday party a week or so ago. The kids were having fun in the pool. Of course then the "adults" got involved in the playing. Brent (Carolyn's husband) and Ty (Brent's brother) decided to teach the kids how to do flips off the diving board. A couple of the little boys managed a few times before the mom's got out there and put a stop to that. Just what we needed was someone to flip close to the board, hit their head. Oh how I wish I could have been out there earlier when they were really going at it. Maybe I would have had some better pictures.

Notice my brother's dog, Rocky running around the outside of the pool. We had to bring him in the house when all the kids were in the pool because he was running around like a crazy boy. I was afraid he would slip and hurt himself or fall in the pool or push one of the really little kids into the water. He couldn't decide what was going on and wanted to protect the kids.

K just looked over my shoulder at the pictures and said I should have been out there earlier because they were trying to do back flips and were having a little trouble. Maybe next time. By the way, if Brent or Ty read this, K says both of you were not very flexible. Her comment is "it was good." Tip: when you hit the water the wrong way, your back (or your front) really gets sore.

Meetings and Manuscripts

2008-09-30T10:19:00.000-07:00

I am heading into my busy time of year at work. We are preparing for our renewal for our big grant, which means that I will be working long hours at work and still bringing stuff home to work on. K hates this time of year. In three weeks we are heading to Philadelphia for me to attend a meeting and mom and K are going with me for K's birthday. We will probably have a small get together with a few of her close friends (meaning about 10 girls), but this is her birthday present from Ric and me. My meeting will be all day on Monday, October 20 (her birthday) and half a day on Tuesday. She is on a fall break on Thursday and Friday the week before. We will leave on Friday and return on Tuesday evening. That will mean that she will miss school Monday-Wednesday because we don't get back until late in the evening and I am taking Wednesday off too.

So, our plans are to visit some sights. K loves her some history so this is going to be an exciting trip. The days that I am in the meetings, Gram is going to take her to do some stuff. I am sorry I am going to miss it, but I didn't go to the meeting last year in Oregon so I kind of have to show my face this year.

Unfortunately the meetings always fall on or around K's birthday so I try to skip once in a while so I can actually make her birthday special. Thankfully, we go over a lot of the same things each year so it isn't a huge deal.

We are also getting a bunch of manuscripts out in the next few weeks. My biggest pet peeve is people who don't know how to use some of the basic programs to create bibliographies. Now I don't expect everyone in the world to know how to do these, but if you work at a University, you expect people who actually write manuscripts to know how to use them. They are fairly simple databases and if you just take a few minutes to mess around with them... I am working on three right now. The same "author" is writing these and she has no idea how to use the program. Instead, the way she notes her references means I have to spend hours (seriously) looking for the proper reference in PubMed. To top it off, I normally do a quick glance to make sure that the grammar and spelling is correct. Yeah, I have no idea how this person has a Ph.D.

It is one thing that The Boss is not an English as a first language speaker, so there are occasions that her grammar isn't quite right. I am used to it. But this other person has no excuses. She should know how to format sentences and to spell simple words. Even when I have no idea what the actual science is about in the manuscript, I can tell when something doesn't fit quite right. And punctuation! Oh my. I have never seen so many mistakes.

So that is how I have spent my morning. I am also teaching one of my co-workers how to use one of the bibliography programs. Unfortunately, she has a Mac and I have a PC so there are some differences, but at least she has picked up the basics really quickly and we can both learn something new as I learn on a new platform. I am much more adventurous than she is when it comes to trying something new in the program. Probably because I know I can fix almost anything with the program and can backtrack, but she isn't quite there yet so when I suggested she press "ok" for something earlier, I thought she was going to have a heart attack when it messed things up pretty good. I keep trying to tell her, if you don't try something new with these programs, you won't ever get to be a pro at them.

Now, if I could just get all these students, faculty, and others to learn how to at least try out a program that is only beneficial to them, I would spend a lot less time on these mundane tasks and more time on the important things.

2008-09-30T10:03:00.000-07:00

If you know anything about K, you would know she loves bags... purses, bags, backpacks... we have more in our house than anyone I have ever met. She is the Amelda Marcos of bags. And she isn't even 13 yet. I used to be the same, I now only have two handbags, I had to get rid of one a few weeks ago because it broke. I just saw over at Kori's blog a contest at Handbag Planet. They are giving away a handbag an hour for 24 hours. Oh, I hope I win because you know the one I am using now just is pathetic. I know which one I want to win, do you?

2008-09-29T16:39:00.000-07:00

This is what met us in the room when we arrived... The note says: "Our prayers have been answered. Congratulations on the wonderful news! Enjoy your weekend, Anne, Kathy, and Stacy." What a great way to start out a celebratory weekend. Before we opened the champagne we decided to wander around the hotel for a bit since it was still fairly early. There was a couple singing in the lounge area so we went down and enjoyed that for an hour or so, each of had a drink, and just relaxed and enjoyed the music. We went back up to the room and popped opened the champagne and had ourselves a toast or two...

Okay, maybe I had more than two. Since Ric doesn't have any taste after the treatments, he didn't enjoy it quite as much as I did.

Saturday we got up, and enjoyed the huge shower in the room. I am not kidding, five or six people could have easily gotten into this thing and there would still be room to spare. (We took turns, so it was very roomy). We then decided to take a walk around the grounds since they have a guided path up into the foothills.

Our first stop was the koi pond, just outside of the hotel. This was amazing. There were a ton of fish and they were all at least two feet long! See the ducks? They were miniature compared to these giants. There were also some very large catfish that would come up and grab some food as well, but they were very hard to photograph. We spent a little time watching some people throw the food to them and we enjoyed a little banter with the folks from the east coast.

Our next stop was a butterfly garden. There were a ton of these little buggers around. It was really beautiful. We stopped here for a bit to relax and enjoy the butterflies. There were all kinds of moths and butterflies and a quite a few bees.

The path then winds around up through the desert area with all of the different species of cactus and desert plants labelled. There were markers with the different animals, birds, and insects you might see on the walk. We saw some lizards. That was about it. Ric said he was hoping to see a snake, I am sure that was just for my benefit since I am sure I would have made it back to the hotel in 2.5 seconds and then not left the room for the rest of the weekend. Thankfully, luck was on my side.

Along the path there is a small stream that runs from the waterfall to the hotel. The waterfall is a natural one that towers 80 feet. The water was not running very heavily, but there was a placard that stated that there is a pump that transports the water during the dryer seasons. During the monsoons it can fill the pool and the little patio area completely up.

This was from a little overlook that we walked up to after we had been down at the bottom of the waterfall. We then walked back to the hotel and Ric took a nap. While the walk wasn't that difficult, it tired him out pretty quickly and it was hot. We should have thought to bring a bottle of water with us when we went, but we weren't thinking. Yes, I live in the desert and I am an idiot. Water is a necessity.

After the walk we went to the pool, please excuse those white chubby legs of mine. I was really trying to subtly get a picture of that east coast couple sitting in front of us. You will note, I am sitting in the shade (as was Ric). When we got out of the pool we went and sat in the shade where I promptly had to go across to the other side and get some towels because Mr. No Fat on His Bones was cold. Ahhh, the joys of cancer treatments. Anyway, please note the couple sitting in front of us. In the sun. Arizona has one of the largest incidences of skin cancer in the United States. I can tell you, years ago, I would have been right there next to them, soaking up the rays. Thankfully, I am not one of those sun worshippers any longer and I am lucky I don't have any signs of skin cancer. Knock on wood. Anyway, the guy was a lobster. His wife, wasn't too far behind. The guy standing at the edge of the pool reading his paper? Yeah, he was red too. I will take my white legs any day over those lobsters.

If you look carefully toward the bottom of the picture, on one of the red flowers, a little yellow finch decided to join us in the shade. He was picking the flowers off the plant. We then went back to the room and made reservations for dinner at one of the restaurants on-site. We got cleaned up or in Ric's case, warmed up and headed out for a nice dinner. In the front of the hotel is another pond with more koi.

Just look at these guys swimming over each other in case we had food to throw them (which we didn't). They come right up when they see people at the railings. It was crazy.

On our walk over, Ric wanted me to take a picture of this house up on the mountain. I guess it was to remind himself that we will never be able to afford something so extravegant? Who knows, it was a huge house.

The restaurant overlooked a beautiful hole on the golf course. Ric was looking longingly at the golfers out there until it got too dark to see. I know that he was wishing he had the energy to go out and play a round of golf. It has been six months or more since he has had the energy to even go to the driving range, so it was taunting him all weekend. I promised him once he got the energy we would come back and he could play golf and I would go to the spa and enjoy a massage while he went and exerted himself on the golf course. I figure that was a fair trade with me getting the better end of the deal.

We had a great dinner, well I had a great dinner. Again, Ric wasn't able to taste much and so he was a little frustrated, but the company was good and we enjoyed ourselves.

I have a bunch more pictures on the camera that I need to download and sort and figure out what I will post here. But until then, enjoy the pictures of our fabulous weekend.

2008-09-29T13:57:00.000-07:00

Our weekend "away" was wonderful! I will post some pictures later tonight.

I didn't want to go back to the house (all of 5 minutes away from the hotel).

It was wonderful and relaxing and it was just what we needed.

The only phone call we got was from K telling us she finally lost that wayward tooth... I tried, I really did try to avoid all phone calls, but when the kid calls...

2008-09-26T12:23:00.000-07:00

I went to the dentist earlier this week and while I don't have to pay for the crown, they are making me pay for some of the work that needs to be done. I don't particularly think that is the "correct" thing since the original dentist should have seen the potential problem and corrected it before it got this far. I asked that they check into this because while the cost is not that great, I don't think I should be responsible because the first dentist was an idiot. I am waiting to hear back from them.

In other news... Ric and I are going "away" this weekend. Some dear, wonderful friends of ours decided a couple of weeks ago that since we got the good news about the PET scan, we should celebrate. They took it upon themselves to make arrangements for us to stay at a local resort this weekend. I knew about it from the start but Ric just found out today when Anne called with the details. He was really surprised.

I am soooo looking forward to this. Just the two of us, in a swanky hotel, no phones, no work.

We have had a tough time the past seven months. There have been so many times when I just wanted to scream because it has been so tough. There have been issues that we haven't quite gotten resolved, but are working on. There are still fears, although they are not nearly as front and center as they were a few weeks ago. This is going to be a time when we can reconnect and just enjoy.

2008-09-23T07:28:00.000-07:00

I hate dentists... not the person, particularly. I have a couple of friends who are dentists. No, I hate that the dentist I go to can't for the life of him get his staff to keep a crown in my mouth. Not just any crown, because I have a couple. No, just the one in the back lower left side of my mouth. I have had this stupid thing done four times. I have paid for it... four times. Do you know how much money this thing costs?! This does not include the number of times they have had to re-cement the thing in. Crowns are supposed to last an average of ten years...

So, a week or so ago, the stupid thing fell out again. While I was eating bread. Not chewy candy. Not gum. Nope, bread. A main staple food. I try to avoid the chewy candy (which eliminates a lot more than you would think). I try not to chew gum. All because of the stupid crown. Bread. Thankfully, I didn't swallow it. I went, cleaned it up, grabbed a little Fixodent (I bought the last time this happened) and stuck it back in my mouth. Did I call the dentist right away? Nope, I didn't have the money to go in to get it re-cemented because they would have considered it an "emergency" and charged me three times as much to go in. So, Friday night. Sitting around the table with my parents, my sister and her family, we are eating pot roast. Pot roast, a nice soft food that shouldn't bother anything. The crown falls out... again. I was pissed. Nothing to fix it with at my parents' house. We go home. I had forgotten I didn't use Fixodent. I go to have a little snack before bed. Cheetos. Guess what? I swallowed the damn thing. Eating Cheetos!

So, the dentist has office hours from 9-3 on Saturdays. I start calling at 9:30. Every 15 minutes to a half hour I call. Up until 3:00. Does anyone answer the phone? No. Is it an emergency? Not in my mind.

I called them yesterday, first thing. I told the receptionist I needed an appointment and I needed to talk to the office manager. She asks what it is about, I tell her my crown fell out. She is obviously looking at the computer and asks, "the one on the bottom left?" She says "well, we can schedule an emergency appointment to have it re-cemented in." I sarcastically told her that it would be difficult since I swallowed it. She wonders why I need to talk to the office manager. I told her in no uncertain terms that their work was inferior and that I was not paying for the thing for the fifth time. Besides that, the insurance has a real problem with paying for a crown before five years. I have had the thing replaced four times in the last six years. No, I am not going to pay again.

So, she tells me that she will have the office manager call me and then they will set up the appointment. That was yesterday. Has the office manager called me? The answer to that would be no.

The "tooth" that is left has had a root canal. It doesn't bother me, except that it is an odd shape and it is rough so my tongue goes to it all the time. Do I really need the stupid crown? Probably not. But my dentist doesn't do extractions so it will cost me a few hundred dollars to go somewhere else to get it done. A few hundred dollars that I will have to pay because they can't do it correctly. A few hundred dollars that I don't have.

K hasn't been to the dentist in a couple of years. Not that I have intentionally been putting it off, but it always costs me a few hundred dollars when she goes because she has seen a pediatric dentist in the past. Her teeth are like her father's... they are terribly soft and there are a few issues. In fact, she has one tooth (a baby tooth) that has just been pushed to the side of her mouth by the grown up tooth. It hasn't fallen out. It is just there, off to the side. It doesn't bother her, but it needs to come out. I have tried pulling it with pliers. It won't budge.

So not only do I need to go back to the dentist and will probably have to pay for them to "fix" the crown which will probably need to be replaced next year, but I have to get her in to the dentist sometime in the near future. It would really help if I could count on her dad to pay me half of her bill like he is supposed to, but he is already two months behind in his meager child support (again). He isn't going to give me a few hundred dollars to get her teeth fixed. Especially since he doesn't really care how her teeth look.

If my dentist's office doesn't call me by lunch time, I am going to be calling them again. I don't think I can be nice.

2008-09-22T08:31:00.000-07:00

Really?!

You Belong in 1954

You're fun loving, romantic, and more than a little innocent. See you at the drive in!

What Year Do You Belong In?

Ummmm, okay.... I don't know about the innocent part, but sure...

Baptisms and Birthdays

2008-09-21T22:52:00.001-07:00

I am feeling so much better... I still have a horrible cough, but it is clearing up and I can control it most of the time. My dad brought some Olbas Oil back from Scotland since he had a cold during the last part of his trip. If you have never tried this. I definitely recommend it. It is the best. I would liken it to Vick's, but a much better scent, even though K hates it. It is used as an inhalant decongestant. You basically put a couple of drops on a tissue and breathe it in. I have also put it on the neckline of my shirts (it doesn't stain) and use it that way. Right now it is one of the only things that is helping the cough. The cough seems worse in the middle of the night after I have been laying down for awhile. (Which is why I am sitting here uploading pictures of our Sunday instead of sleeping).

In other news... my niece was baptized today. This is Sarah ZhanMei JianJia. Isn't she just gorgeous?!

K and H have the middle name of Rose. When H was born, K wanted her to have the same name as she did. When Carolyn and Brent were in the process of adopting, they wanted the girls to have a similar middle name. They gave two choices to B. One meant rose, the other rosebud. B picked ZhanMei, meaning rosebud. He liked that the "Zhan" sounds similar to John which is my dad and brother's name. JianJia is her orphanage name. It means excellence. The dress she is wearing is one that my dad's aunt Clara made for my sister and I when we were little. Oh how I wish I had taken a picture of K wearing it. She wore it a few times with a peach colored ribbon. My cousin's daughter, A wore it and we have a picture of her. Sarah's sister, H, wore it and we have a picture. When K and H were baptized, they were babies so they wore the christening gowns that my sister and I wore when we were baptized. My cousins also wore the gowns. Since S is older, Carolyn wanted her to wear something of ours as well. Now the dresses will be put up and saved for when one of the girls has their own daughter.

I liked this one because Pastor Ted was actually touching her head. She was so calm during this part of the service, even though you could tell she was nervous with all the "strangers" around. I was nice to go to this church because there were a lot of people that used to go to our church there.

Since Carolyn's camera is not working, I was in charge of trying to get some pictures today. I hope I got enough! This is one of Pastor Ted, S, Carolyn and Brent.

The kids waiting for church to start... H, K, A, B, and D. K is definitely a little mother to H. Right now she is loving it. I am sure when K gets a little older, she will prefer to not have the little ones hanging around her, but for now, it works. A wanted to sit next to her too.

This is typical... K carrying H. The girl is almost 4 and K would rather carry her around.

And there she is, playing after church... She has really become a walker. When Carolyn and Brent brought her back from China, she wasn't crawling. She loved to hold your hands and walk around the room. She never did crawl and went right to walking.

After church, A went over and gave Ric a hug... I love that she is such a hugger. She is so sweet and is so excited to see everyone all the time.

This is S and her Poppa (Brent's dad). She is really warming up to everyone and isn't always such a mama and dada's girl. She spent a lot of time with me today, sharing her watermelon. Carolyn has been teaching her some basic baby signs and I was working on "thank you" with her. She hasn't quite gotten it, but soon. She is a smart one.

My mom and dad brought her a Scottish tam back from Scotland. Just a reminder of her "Scottish" heritage... :)

Carolyn's friend, Aunt Kimmie and her boy s, brought S a beautiful board book of weekly prayers. S wasn't too impressed. She liked the paper much better.

H will be celebrating her 4th birthday on September 24 so we had a celebration with all of the family today since they were getting together for S's baptism. H is all girl and loves to play dress up. She also loves Tinkerbell. This was the gift that Ric and I bought for her... Guess what she is going to be for Halloween?

She also got a new baby and stroller from Gram and Mumpie... The new baby is named Alice. At least it isn't Squash or Zucchini like a couple of the others... Or how about Bert, Bert, and Herbert? Those are three others. Notice the little mother hovering in the background.

This is Summerset and H. If you've ever read any of the books by J.D. Robb, you will know who Summerset is. This is my mom's Summerset. I have a slightly different one at home too. The Summerset's often get into the spirit of the holidays or events that we are celebrating. The surprising thing was, he spent the whole afternoon holding that cupcake and no one took it from him and John's dog, Rocky, didn't even try to get it. My dogs would have been after it the minute our backs were turned.

I can't not have a picture of B. I hardly saw him today, he was too busy playing with the cousins and friends so there were only a couple of pictures of him before he disappeared. His favorite gift from Gram and Mumpie from Scotland was his tin whistle. The boy can play! The instructions had a bunch of songs with fingering and he picked it right up. His favorite, so far, is When the Saints Go Marching In. He practiced for about an hour and now knows it by heart. We are hoping he eventually moves on to another song because the saints have marched in too many times already...

And one last picture... blowing kisses...

2008-09-18T23:57:00.000-07:00

Ugggg! I am still sick. I just can't shake this cough and my sinuses are killing me. I got sent home from work today. Yup, you read that right. The Boss came in, took one look at me and said "Go Home". How's that for the start of a day? I stuck it out for a few hours, coughing every two minutes, wiping my sore eyes, and blowing my nose. She came back into my cubicle about 10:30 and said, "Go home". So home I went. Right into my bed, and slept for four hours. Ric went and got me some stuff at the Walgreens. Meanwhile, I just sat in bed and did nothing. I already sent a note to The Boss and my coworker and told them I wouldn't be in tomorrow. Hopefully, the extra sleep and not so much stress will help be shake this stuff.

On a side note... I was watching the news tonight and they were talking about a local school. The mascot is the jaguar. I just want to say... there is no "i" in jaguar. It is not pronounced "jag-wire". I am just saying....

2008-09-16T10:57:00.000-07:00

It still hasn't sunk in yet. At least I don't think so. I keep repeating to myself, "There is no cancer." I can't believe it. After all this time living in fear, I am living with hope right now. It is so hard to get back to that feeling. Someone pinch me.

My parents got back from their trip to Scotland last night. Even though they were tired, and we were tired, and K still had some homework, we spent some time at their house visiting. Dad is sick. K and I are sick. Let's hope Ric doesn't get sick. K blames her friend's sister... I just blame K. She is, after all, the one who brought this crap home to me. At least I am not having to carry around a box of kleenex with me all day, like I did yesterday and Sunday. Instead I am carrying around cough drops.

Tonight we will probably do nothing but sit in front of the TV and do nothing. At least that is what I hope I can do. Right now I am just trying to make it through the day.

2008-09-15T13:02:00.001-07:00

I came home from work. I couldn't concentrate, knowing Ric is cancer free right now. I can't tell you the relief we are feeling. It is so odd not having the fear at the front of our minds. While I don't think it has sunk in completely, the feeling of relief is great.

I have not had enough faith in God in the past few months. My faith has wavered. Ric's never has. I need to trust God more.

When I came in the house we just held each other and cried for a few minutes. We are tired, emotionally. This has been the longest and toughest seven months of our lives.

I don't know what the next steps are going to be with regard to appointments and scans and right now I don't want to know.

I am so thankful to our primary care doctor who is very proactive and immediately send Ric to a specialist. I am thankful to the specialist who did the surgery and removed as much of the cancer as he could. I am so thankful to the oncologists who treated Ric so aggressively.

We still have a long way to go to get him back on his feet and his protein levels back to a normal level. He needs to gain a lot of weight, but he is alive and he is cancer free.

I wouldn't have made it through this without my family and friends. I am going to go now and hug on my hubby some more.

2008-09-15T09:40:00.000-07:00

It is clear! The PET scan came back clear! Praise God!

2008-09-13T20:12:00.001-07:00

I didn't sleep much last night. Ric and I spent most of the evening watching the news of Ike. We got a call late from his son in Hawaii to ask about Ric's parents. Shae wanted to make sure that they were okay, etc. Turns out, we have no idea if they are okay. Because of Ric's low energy he sleeps very well. I am not always so lucky. I spent the evening and morning hours on the couch with the news on. I catnapped a bit, but watching the storm move closer and closer to them was making me nervous. When Ric came in around 6:00 this morning, I left the TV to him with the promise he would call his parents. He got through but they were without power. He spoke to his sister (outside of Dallas) and she was getting rain. We have been calling since the storm, for the most part, has passed over their area, but have not been able to get through. So we are still a bit worried.

2008-09-12T20:48:00.000-07:00

No news today about the PET scan. Ric keeps telling me, the longer they take, the better the news. Okay, I can appreciate that. if there was something horrible on the scan, they would call right away, right? Of course it has only been two and half days. I am expecting we hear something on Monday. Oh, I hope we hear something on Monday. The waiting is so stressful.

I got an email from my mom and dad who are in Scotland until Monday night. They have been in Ireland for a few days and just got back to mom's cousin's place. She has internet so the first thing she asked about was Ric. That was nice. I can't wait for them to get home on Monday night. Two weeks without phone contact with mom is very hard! I usually see them every day since K goes to their house after school. I usually talk to mom on the phone at least once a day. It is hard to have to wait to talk to them. K has been counting the days until they get home. She thought they would be back on Saturday and was prepared to stay home from her dad's so she could see them. Now she has to wait until Monday night to pick them up from the airport. Poor kid, needs her Gram and Mumpie!

We have been watching the news most of the evening, keeping up with Hurricane Ike. I was in Galveston for a meeting two years ago in December and had such a nice time. The island is beautiful and so full of history. Unfortunately, a lot of the history relates to hurricanes, like the one in 1900 that killed over 6,000 people. I would love to go back and do more touring instead of just being able to go around the areas of the hotel and the Medical Branch. I hope that those that are associated with their center are safe.

I have been checking Wendy's blog frequently as she lives in the Houston area. She and her daughter and the dogs have left the area however, her husband is a firefighter in Houston and has remained behind due to work commitments (obviously with the storm). As of her last post, he is safe. I pray for his continued safety.

Ric's parents are going to be hit pretty good sometime tomorrow. His aunt and her family went up to the lake where his parent's live. They live in Beaumont. Sue has one more treatment left of her chemo and then she will be done. I know she is having a tough time here at the end. It isn't so much the chemo as the emotional issues that go along with the cancer. I don't know if that is the best way to explain it, but I know she and Ric have spoken a lot in the last few weeks. Doyle went and got gas for the cars, and has gas for their generators. They also have extra water and food so they should be okay. When they were hit with the residuals of Katrina they had no water for a week or so and FEMA really helped them out. Of course this storm seems to be much bigger and will probably hit them closer. Pray that they are all okay.

2008-09-10T12:12:00.000-07:00

Updated: We have finally made it home. They must have wore him out because he fell asleep in the car on the way home and immediately crawled into bed when we got here. He said they will have the results to all four doctors in 3-4 days. We are hoping we have the results on Monday. I asked if they had given him any indication of what was going on and of course he said no. The next few days will be difficult, I am sure. Please keep us in your prayers.

Ric is undergoing his PET scan right now. I had to go to the house (about 30 minutes from work), then to the Radiology place we thought the scan was going to be at (20 minutes from house), then to the real Radiology place (25 minutes from 1st Radiology place). I dropped him off, found out how long it would take for the scan (about 2 hours), then came back in to work (30 minutes from Radiology place 2). I feel like I have driven all over town today. Guess what? I have. I am here at work for about an hour and half and then will go back to pick him up and take him home. I don't think I am going to come back to work. There is just too much driving.

2008-09-09T10:34:00.000-07:00

It is just another one of those days.... Last night didn't turn out exactly like I had hoped. In fact it was so far from what I had hoped that I ended up hiding out in the bedroom for most of the evening. With Ric being moody (justifiably so) and K being a preteen hormonal mess (ahhhhh), and me just having one of those days... Dinner slowly deteriorated to us all going our separate ways for the evening.

Today.... today is going to be better.... :) See how I can put a positive spin on it?

2008-09-08T12:26:00.000-07:00

After reading Kori's newest post about Richard's treatment I started thinking. Everyone is in a different place in the whole cancer journey. Some are at the beginning, where I was seven months ago. And some are nearing the end, Richard and my friend Marti. And some of us have been through it once and are at a different stage of the journey all over again. When my Uncle passed away after five years of living with Mesothelioma (because he did live with it) it was horrible for my family. Unfortunately, I was just beginning the whole journey all over again with Ric.

Some people are able to get off the cancer journey somewhere in the middle. They are the ones whose treatment worked. They are the ones who still have to go through scans and fear the cancer returned, but they get to get off this roller coaster for longer periods of time. I want to be one of those people. Will I get the chance? I don't know. I am afraid the questions will keep coming at me.

Ric's cousin had the same type of cancer that he has. It wasn't as severe as Ric's, but it was the same type. He didn't have to have the same treatments. He didn't have to have such invasive surgery. But he recently had his five year check up and is all clear. He doesn't have to go back every six months. He can go back yearly to get a scan. Will Ric be in that position? I don't know. Each cancer is different for different people.

One of the hardest things to deal with are the emotions. Sometimes you are positive and saying, "we can get this thing" or "cancer is not going to rule my life". Other times the feelings of loss and heartbreak for the future take over. "when?", "why?" My life fluctuates between the two. But I am not the one who is dealing with the actual cancer. I am not the one who has to go through the months of painful and uncomfortable treatments.

Ric knows how I feel. We talk about it a lot. There it is ruling our lives. We can't avoid it. We can't brush it under the rug, but we can put it aside for moments. We can purposefully remember that life does go on. Life does not stop because of the cancer. There is still joy in our lives. There is still fun moments. There is still love to keep our hearts well.

When I talk to others who are dealing with the journey, I sometimes think it is easier for me to see their paths. To watch them try to beat this thing with grace and dignity. Watching my Uncle die was not easy. It was full of ups and downs. The very last time I saw him was when he was in the intensive care unit on life support. They were waiting for my cousin to get back into town. Ric and I went to visit and he was in a medical coma. He was agitated. The nurse was in the room with him. When we began talking to him, he calmed down. He knew we were there. He knew we were with him. The next day they changed his medication so he never fully regained consciousness until the day they took him off life support. I wasn't there. My aunt and my cousin were. He was at peace. He knew it was his time. He was ready. But I wasn't dealing with his cancer on a daily basis. My aunt was. She was the one who had the highs and lows. She was the one who took care of him during his last months on earth.

People often forget that the cancer doesn't just attack one person. It attacks whole families. No one who is dealing with cancer in their family is immune. The emotions get the best of us daily. I can't tell you how many times Ric and I have taken our pain out on each other. I get frustrated because he can't do some of the things he used to. I miss a lot of things. Eventually he will get back to where he was, but until then, I get to be the nag, the one reminds him to eat, the one who asks (repeatedly) if he took his pills. While he knows that I am doing it out of love and concern and being the caretaker, it frustrates him. He feels helpless that he can't help me like he wants to. He looks in the mirror and sees someone he doesn't recognize. The cancer and its treatments have taken over.

We are at a small stop in the journey. We are in limbo not knowing what the scan on Wednesday will bring, but grateful that there are no treatments right now. Will there be treatments in another month? We don't know. The hardest part for me is the unknown. My greatest fear right now is the calm before the storm. I don't feel very calm, but the thought of what may happen is a great fear. I don't want to live in fear.

Last night I was putting our anniversary cards away and looking at the pictures of the wedding. Two years ago. Two years ago Ric looked wonderful. He was healthy and happy. I look at the pictures now and while he looks better than he has in months, he doesn't look healthy. He is not very happy. Yes there are times when he is joyful and grateful for our lives, the old him just isn't there. Will it be back? I hope so.

I told my friend Marti this weekend I was afraid of the scan. I told her I hoped that they would call and tell us the results rather than call and ask us to come in. I just want to hear, no more treatments. I want to hear, we don't want to see you back for three months. I want to hear that the cancer journey is heading toward full recovery. I want to be positive. I want to be supportive of Ric. I want to take care of my family. I want to not cry every day because of my fears. I want to be able to tell those who have just started on the journey that there is hope.

I wish that no one would ever have to go through this. Ever. I wish I could hug Kori and Richard and tell them it is going to be okay. I can do that for those who are close to me. I can send virtual hugs to Kori and tell her I know what she is going through. But do I really? I know she is in pain. I feel that. I understand that. I want to hug her boys and tell them, your dad loves you so much. They know that... they understand that. I want to tell Richard, whatever you decide with your treatment, you will have support and love. Yes, this road is painful. Yes, this road if full of heartbreak. I want to tell Kori, it will be okay, eventually. It won't happen overnight. It won't be easy. It will happen. God knows us. God will take care of us. God understands our pain, our fear, our love.

Is it a good day? Not so much. Is it a bad day? No. This is just an okay day. This is just a day that is making me reflective of my life. Will the day get better. Oh, I hope so. When I get home, K, Ric and I will sit together and have dinner. We will have family time and watch some television. We will go to bed and I will feel Ric's arms around me and know he loves me. When I wake up tomorrow, I hope it is a good day.

2008-09-08T12:11:00.000-07:00

Ruby aka Lucky survived most of the weekend... notice the word most. Saturday he was looking great. Swimming and moving around like normal. Last night as we were getting ready to close down for the night, K noticed he was floating on his side. I checked him out and sure enough he had kicked the bucket. We had a proper fish burial (flushed him down the toilet) and went to bed.

I felt so guilty pouring him down the sink. I didn't feel so bad flushing him. If we hadn't done everything we could to get him out of the sink, I probably would never have been able to use the disposer again. We could see him moving around and I just couldn't let him suffer.

Poor fish...

2008-09-07T13:12:00.000-07:00

After two long years with no pastor at our church, Pastor David said his first sermon today. He is funny and kind and his sermon was so good. Those who have jumped ship to find a church with a regular minister are missing something special. Our congregation has never been very large, but it has really shrunk in the past two years. I am so grateful for those members who are still around because they are family. They are the ones who have prayed daily for Ric, K and I during the treatments. They are the ones who have been joyful when he was finally finished with the chemo and radiation. They are the ones who understand my fears for the follow up PET scan on Wednesday. They are the ones who want me to send out a prayer chain when we get the results. They are the ones who will share in our joy or comfort us in sorrow depending on the results. We are so lucky to have family like them.

I started up the children's Sunday School again this week. We always have such a good time, even though I get driven crazy by a couple of them. I have to remember, don't sit siblings next to each other because they know how to push buttons. I have to remember to sit the older ones next to the younger ones to help with the craft project. I have to remember to have patience when my boy S is particularly contrary.

We were doing a hangman type of game, with a special message for the kids today. Each one got to take turns picking letters to fill in the blanks. The end result, if they failed was a (very sad looking) fish on a fishing pole. S kept purposely picking letter that he knew would not be in the phrase... X, Z, Q, etc. Yup, I love the kid. He is a sweetheart, but he is teaching me patience.

Two of the younger girls love to play with each other and sit together in church. One happens to be my cousin's daughter A. Toward the end of church we had a special program to welcome Pastor David and Elizabeth. It was wonderful with songs written especially for them, special music, including K playing her violin, little welcome speeches from different age groups. Well, A and her friend E were sitting in a pew in the back. I heard some giggling. I looked back and couldn't see them. Now remember, they are 8 years old. My aunt (A's grandmother) looked back as well. I got up, walked to the back and they were under the pews playing. Ummmm.... no. A immediately got up and sat down. E on the other hand, just looked at me. I told them in no uncertain terms that they were to sit in their seat quietly or else they would not be able to sit together again (E's grandmother was in the kitchen getting ready for the potluck or they would never have done this). Patience, Ms. Susie, Patience. It is a wonderful thing. Some day I will have enough to make it through one Sunday morning.

2008-09-06T11:01:00.000-07:00

This is our beta, Ruby. Ruby now has a new name. His name is Lucky.

Lucky has spent many months sitting in the same place on my little secretary desk. Every week or so I clean his bowl. Normally all I do is dump the water out in the sink and add new water. Last time I changed his bowl to a slightly bigger one with a different lip so the plant at the top looks better.

Last night while cleaning with the old bowl, poor Ruby aka Lucky, slipped out and down the drain. We have a very old disposal so we could see him. I freaked. Ric tried to get him out, but he flopped into the side and down into the disposal. About a half hour later, the disposal was taken apart, under the sink was soaked with water, and Lucky was back in his bowl, just slightly worse for wear. I think he was in shock.

Today he is doing fine and happily swimming around his little bowl. Next time I need to be a little more careful. Poor Lucky.

2008-09-05T13:00:00.001-07:00

Ric's PET scan is scheduled for September 10 at 12:00 pm. When we get the results is not scheduled. I am nervous about this. I know that the doctors are positive that the treatment has gotten rid of the cancer. I need to have more faith. I have to keep reminding myself, they do know what they are doing. I don't think I will be completely calm until I hear the results for myself.

Hilarious....

2008-09-04T14:24:00.000-07:00

2008-09-04T13:30:00.001-07:00

Kori over at Between a Whisper and a Roar gave me an award.... Thank you! I have to say, Kori is one amazing person, not only because she hearts me, but because of her steadfast love for her family and God.

Here are the instructions for this award.
1.The winner puts logo on her/his blog.
2.Link the person you received your award from.
3.Nominate 7 other blogs.
4.Put links of those blogs on yours.
5.Leave a message on the blogs of those you’ve chosen.

So now, I have to choose 7 other blogs to pass this award to...

1. Kori at See Kori Rant will be first. Kori is another amazing person who has been through a lot of issues lately with the CSG. She is also someone I can definitely count on to make my day with her stories...

2. Carolyn at Dragon Scales and Mermaid Tails... and not just because she is my twin sister, but because I love to hear about three of my favorite people in the world.

3. Mary at Almost Somewhat Positive... Cause she makes me laugh and has two of the cutest little girls in the world.

4. Tisha from Crazy Working Mom... She is clever and witty and her kids are cute as can be. I love that Tyler thought he could get his new baby sister out of his mommy's tummy by using a screwdriver to open her belly button, when the fact of the matter is, we know that when you unscrew a belly button your butt falls off (family joke).

5. Wendy at the Firehouse Journal because I love her little Catherine and I love her beautiful pictures and her posts about her career. If you read through her blog, you will find that Wendy has been through a lot in her life and has come out stronger than ever.

6. Baggage over at Baggage that goes with Mine. I have followed her blog for a while and love how much she loves her kids. Her stories are hilariously funny.

7. Last, but certainly not least, Alyson from 3 P's in a Pod and 3 P's Mama because she has lots of fun giveaways and three cute little Ps. She also always has a kind word to say when things are going rough.

2008-09-04T13:26:00.000-07:00

Turns out the labor board agrees with Ric. When the labor guy called Hoss, he decided to get himself an attorney. Oh joy... In the meantime, I just left Ric from lunch and he was on the phone with Hoss (who had called him). Hoss just wants to argue and make empty threats. It is so ridiculous. I am not too concerned because we have the law on our side of this issue, but it is very irritating.

2008-09-04T10:29:00.000-07:00

Remember back when we had a driver for the truck, named Hoss... yea, well the all those nice things I said about him? Screw it... the jerk. When he was hired, Ric told him outright what his expectations were. When he asked for an advance of $250 before he left on his first trip, Ric gave it to him. Took it out of his first check. Over time we noticed the gas mileage of the truck was getting smaller and smaller and gas prices were going higher and higher. He was calling and telling us that he had no money for food. Ummmm, we pay him, we don't provide his meals too. There is a small fridge and a microwave on the truck. Ric hardly ever ate at truck stops because they are too expensive. He ate in the truck. We would go and stock up at least a month's worth of canned food, etc. and spend $40. Hoss was spending at least $40 a day on food on the road. He never ate in the truck. Then he would call and say he needed an advance for food. He even started to try skipping over Ric and going directly to the broker for an advance. That didn't work (thank goodness).

We would have to get comp checks for the gas. That was eating away any money that was coming in. We were getting very close to breaking even, and that was before we had to pay him. He knew what the situation was at our house with the truck's finances. It seems like he was trying to get as much out of it as possible, while leaving us in a hole. I called his last employer (who is a friend) and found out there were some issues. We called Hoss on it and told him again what our expectations were. It just got worse. Finally, Ric had to let him go. At the time, he was doing a run for two different brokers. Instead of bringing the information for one brokerage to us, he left it with the other. Well, then it took a week for us to get it in the mail from the first broker. Of course this is the one that doesn't pay out quickly. A month later and we still don't have the money, not unusual. However, Hoss called even before we realized he screwed up and wanted his paycheck. Even before he brought us the receipts for gas. It doesn't work that way.

Then he tried to claim that he had more receipts that weren't in the envelope, but he couldn't find them, we should reimburse him anyway. It ended up his last paycheck was only $600. He was thinking it was going to be much more. We figure out that he had pocketed at least $500 from draws from the previous comp checks. He will get paid his $600. It will be mailed this week... to the labor board. He called them two days after he returned, before we had even gotten his paperwork and claimed we were trying to keep his check from him.

Thankfully, Ric spoke to the guy at the labor board and he did some checking on this guy. It will not effect the company in any way after they have completed the investigation. We are responsible for his $600, Ric never disputed that. We are in the process of reviewing his trip envelopes to see if there are any other surprises for us.

Ric has been in a mood all week because of this. I can't wait to get this guy our of our lives...

What better way to spend our anniversary then....

2008-09-01T18:04:00.000-07:00

in the Emergency Room...

K called me from her dad's house. Apparently she tripped over his dog and scraped up her legs and hands. Not only that, her wrist and hand were hurting pretty bad. So off we went to meet them at the Emergency Room. A couple of hours and a few x-rays later and....

It isn't broken, but it is pretty sore. She has to wear the brace for at least a week. No PE. The great thing about the hospital is they have a Children's ER so we spent our time watching Mary Poppins. Ric was tickling her feet in the second picture. They also brought the x-ray machine right into the room.

2 down, 18 to go...

2008-09-01T07:22:00.001-07:00

When Ric and I got married, we knew, because he was older that we may only have 20-25 years together. We had joked that he promised me those years. When he had the surgery I told him afterward that he had promised me those years and I was holding him to it. Two years ago today, we were married. I love this man. These pictures are a couple of my favorites from our photographer, Patrick.

2008-08-30T16:28:00.000-07:00

I went with Carolyn to get S's ears pierced this afternoon. K's were done when she was 5 weeks old, H's were done when she was about 3 months old, and S is 15 months old. She was pretty good for the whole experience. While I was holding her in the chair waiting for it to get done, she was spending some time hugging and kissing a teddy bear they had at the store. She was so cute with the kissing noises. Holding her down was tough! She is one strong little girl. Fortunately, it went quickly. Carolyn came right in to cuddle with her and reassure her. There were some tears. Afterward, she came right back to me and let me carry her for awhile. So she wasn't too upset with me for subjecting her to a little pain. Poor baby!

This is a before picture

Kissing and hugging on the teddy bear. It kept her occupied for a few minutes while they prepared to pierce her ears. Carolyn was outside the store where she couldn't hear her baby cry too loudly.

This is the "my Bubba made me get hurt look"

K is H's best buddy. H loves to give K kisses. Bubba, not so much. I had to pout to even get a little one.

When we left the mall, S was blowing me kisses. She is such a sweet little thing.

I took K to her Grandma's house while her dad was at work and spent a little time visiting with Jean. It was a pleasant visit. I love that K likes to spend time with her and to help her out. She is almost 84 years old and has some medical issues related to diabetes (leg problems, and one glass eye, the other eye isn't doing so well).

Now Ric and I are going to relax and spend a nice quiet evening together.

2008-08-30T03:07:00.000-07:00

You Are Mulan!

Strong and spirited. You're no one's girly girl; actually you are very determined person with a strong sense of self. Never let go of that! The only thing that equals your sense of self is your family, but the traditions of society can always be bent to protect something or someone you love.

Which Disney Princess Are You?